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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

I don’t have any patience because it takes too long.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

Tears for Fears: Everybody wants to rule the world. Me: Some of us just want eight hours of uninterrupted sleep.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

Is it better to beat someone to the punch or punch someone to the beat?

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

Apparently I’m the reason why I never have any money. I am shocked!

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

Cancel culture has been canceled.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Watermelon. The fruit that comes with a workout.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has downloaded:

If you look close enough, everyone is insane.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has shared:

Never argue with an idiot. They will drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

Who decided that skeletons are scary? Because honestly, I’d be more scared if the muscular system suddenly walked into my room.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

I was going to go for a run, then realized I could just run my mouth on here.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,549

Funny Quotes Topics

16,781

Funny Quotes Images

14,549

Updated

Nov 27, 2025

Users Online

3,956

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Your twenties are for working towards a life you later won’t want.

Seen just now on X:

I personally get offended when rain is referred to as “bad weather.”

Making waves on Facebook:

When there’s food around, our cat is like an adorable, fluffy shark circling round.

Making waves on Messenger:

I have a complicated relationship with push/pull doors.

Just landed via WeChat:

If you’re going to text your boss that you’re an hour late, make sure you end with, “I’m bringing you a ham and cheese croissant.”

Breaking via TikTok:

Wild how we don’t get a public holiday for Wrestlemania, but okay.

Just landed via Telegram:

My kids will never appreciate the amount of extroverting the introvert me does for them.

Going viral on Facebook:

Unless I ask, I genuinely don’t care to hear other people’s opinions on my life. It’s almost a pet peeve, really.

Making waves on YouTube:

I bet aliens lock their door when they go past earth.

Just shared via Reddit:

Sometimes I say “huh,” then answer the question before you can repeat your question.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,549

Funny Quotes Topics

16,781

Funny Quotes Images

14,549

Updated

Nov 27, 2025

Users Online

3,556

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

A guy who never leaves his apartment so he can get the maximum value out of his rent.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

A freshly cleaned bathroom triggers an irresistible urge in men to trim their beard.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

Dear Apple, at no point will I ever text someone “he’ll yeah” ..

Someone from 🇪🇹 has shared:

The pigeons are plotting to overthrow the government. It will start with a coo.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

Stop bothering me, or I will inform you of a behavioral pattern that is noticeable to other people, but I can tell you are not yet aware of.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

Rap fell off when literacy stopped being a requirement.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

Men be like: I would love the opportunity to give you the bare minimum.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

I’m the type of husband that helps his wife look for her missing chocolate that I ate.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

Marriage is for life. But when that was first said, life was shorter.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

Winter. You get up, drink coffee and then it gets dark.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Threads:

Tried to pull off a smokey eye, ended up looking like I went three rounds with McGregor.

Spotted on Discord:

I can’t sleep good when I know the food is feeling cold in the fridge.

Going viral on Reddit:

I now have Taylor Swift as my alarm. Now I always wake up five minutes earlier so I don’t have to listen to it.

Breaking via TikTok:

Excuse me, can you direct me to the nonsense?

Making waves on Threads:

Can’t believe we stayed up and screamed “Happy New Year” for this shit.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Got out of jury duty yesterday by confessing to the crime.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Lazy is such an ugly word. I prefer the term selective participation.

Going bananas on Threads:

Today, I’m wearing pink to raise awareness for people like me who forget to separate their red laundry from their whites.

Trending via Threads:

The year I was born, getting a little far on that little scrolly thing.

Live now on Discord:

I need a weighted blanket that won’t let me get out of bed in the morning.

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