Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

If you ever go backpacking in the wilderness, be sure to wear corduroy pants, so you can start a fire if needed.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

Just a friendly reminder folks. Don’t forget to set back your rooster this weekend.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

Being a woman is hard. You always want to buy something, slap someone, lose weight and eat something sweet.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

have one of those big paintings with the eyeholes cut out, but I don’t have anyone to spy on, so I just watch TV through it.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

They lie on the job descriptions, so lie on your resume.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

I don’t understand why bugs come inside when they have a whole outside to themselves.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

Why did Star Wars Episodes 4, 5 & 6 come out before 1,2 & 3? Because in charge of directing, Yoda was.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has bookmarked:

If she says “so just what exactly is THAT supposed to mean”, you’re gonna have a bad time.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Piñatas are a fun way to intentionally maim the guests at your party.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

If it ain’t broke, my kids haven’t used it yet.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,700

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Twitch:

Not arguing with people anymore, I’m just gonna say “it makes sense that you would think that”.

Making waves on Pinterest:

People will name their dog Steve and have two kids named Buddy and Rocket.

Spotted on Telegram:

My sleep schedule and I are not on speaking terms.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Great minds think alike. Unfortunately, so do stupid ones.

Going viral on Reddit:

First responders? You mean reply guys?

Just landed via Reddit:

I wanna date someone cuter than me, but sadly I am the cutest.

Going viral on X:

I’m not a 10. I’m more like two 5s held together by cheese and chocolate.

Shared recently on Threads:

I have nothing nice to wear for the government shutdown.

Trending via YouTube:

As a beautiful woman, sometimes the most powerful thing you can say is “ew.”

Spotted on Instagram:

It’s a beautiful morning. Lots of people out walking their phones.

Funny discount quotes

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New funny discount quotes 👇

All funny discount quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

71 shares on Reddit this month:

We should all go into advertising and fix what’s going on with commercials. They need our help.

57 shares on Telegram this month:

The inventor of autocorrect walked into a bar and ordered a bear.

39 shares on Snapchat this month:

Long-distance couples be like, “I can’t wait,” and then they wait.

22 shares on Slack this month:

I hope you catch the bouquet at my funeral.

88 shares on Threads this month:

I can’t believe Halloween was 10 pounds ago.

90 shares on YouTube this month:

Rapunzel, let down your CVS receipt!

74 shares on TikTok this month:

I’d stalk me too, I get it.

41 shares on YouTube this month:

There should be an Amazon driver at the Mall during the holidays so adults can sit on their lap and tell them what they want.

83 shares on WhatsApp this month:

When you look this sexy, they should let you leave work early.

61 shares on WeChat this month:

They should make statues of regular people, like you’re walking through the park and there’s a statue of your friend Jeff.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Paycheck hit. I’m at Michaels Arts & Crafts supply store telling them to bring out Michael.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Have you ever just restarted the dryer because you didn’t feel like folding the clothes yet?

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Flour company: What if we sell it in a paper bag that’s not fully sealed at the bottom?

16 folks are currently checking 👀

He was only called Mr. Pepper until he published his groundbreaking research on fizzics.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

You sound unhinged. Let’s go get mugshots.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I bought a watermelon and all I can think about is filling it with vodka.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I like to play this fun game while I clean out the fridge called what is this, how long has it been in here and how do I kill it?

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes you really do write a whole poem just to give one beautiful phrase a home.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

There’s a fat man inside me dying to get out.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish people knew how good I can sing when I’m alone in my car and in my shower.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,489

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

It’s been too long since I partook in shenanigans.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

I don’t argue with idiots on the Internet, I just keep scrolling and mind my own business.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

If you need me, I’ll be in the shower pretending I can sing.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

Christmas combines two things I love the most, getting fat and lying to children.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has bookmarked:

I wonder how much this “Never mind, it’s only 10 bucks” has already cost me?

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

There’s something fundamentally wrong with the way people interact with each other on LinkedIn.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Today I couldn’t find a parking space at work, so I drove back home. Looks like they have enough people there.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has bookmarked:

Gonna tell my dentist that if I’m late, he should start without me.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

Just seen a guy with a Coca-Cola and yellow Lay’s chips. Classic combo, he knows his stuff.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

I’ve reached the conclusion that all men love thigh high stockings.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Pinterest:

Explain it to me like I’m 5 drinks in.

Shared recently on Slack:

“I’m too pretty for this” is a very valid excuse, actually.

Just shared via Discord:

My favorite childhood memory is not paying bills.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Do you say “Excuse me” to your pet when you walk by them, or are you rude?

Going bananas on X:

My kid tells me his toothpaste is “too spicy” but he doesn’t seem to be having any trouble with Flamin’ Hot Cheetos.

Trending via Telegram:

Even my imaginary friend got bored and left me a note saying ‘we should see other people’

Trending via Twitch:

They’re bluffing when they say you can still get knocked off the nice list this late in the game. Santa’s been delivering gifts in Japan for hours by now; that list is locked. Do whatever you want.

Spotted on Reddit:

Little do my friends know they’re healing me every time we hang out.

Trending via Instagram:

I just sneezed into my elbow and now I’m waiting for a preschool teacher to praise me.

Just shared via Threads:

Sheep to the left of me. Cows to the right. Here I am. Stuck on a bus with a view.

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