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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

A hacker called me and said he had all my passwords. I got a pen and paper and said ‘Thank God for that, what are they?’

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

My husband accidentally locked himself out of the house, and I didn’t hear him knocking until I finished eating the rest of his cheesecake. So weird.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

Without the words ‘literally’ and ‘like,’ I am nothing.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

You guys ever play a game for hours straight? You start hallucinating the sounds.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

A relationship is like a shark, it looks better on TV.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has bookmarked:

Men who tell their woman she’s pretty, for no particular reason, keep that shit up.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

To call you stupid would be an insult to stupid people!

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

My husband needs a hearing aid, but refuses to get one because it’s the key to our happy marriage.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

If Shakespeare were being born today, he’d be “Shaxxespyr.”

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

The real threat to Democracy is the Bureaucracy.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,282

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Facebook:

I might be late to a lot of places, but the airport is not one of them.

Spotted on Messenger:

You are why Superman costumes have warning labels telling you the costume won’t make you fly.

Live now on Discord:

I bet there’s a couple of seconds on that medieval torture stretcher rack where it feels incredible.

Just shared via Telegram:

I cannot imagine being in high school right now. Imagine the world is eating itself alive and you’re in school.

Trending via X:

I’ve found that the easiest way to do burpees is to just not do burpees. No pain, no pain.

Going bananas on Slack:

Yeah, I work at the fart bar. Yup. I’m a fartender. Farts on me tonight!

Live now on TikTok:

Just bought a new umbrella for the person that finds it tomorrow.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Before you call me an idiot consider this: I know!

Going bananas on TikTok:

If you saw me licking the plate after the charcuterie was finished, no you didn’t.

Just shared via Discord:

I’m not here to make friends, just noise.

Funny dreaming quotes

Funny dreaming quotes are the perfect way to add a splash of humor to your nighttime adventures 🌙😴. Whether you’re chasing wild dreams or just snoozing through reality, these witty sayings will have you laughing in your sleep 😂✨. Get ready to giggle, smile, and maybe even rethink those crazy dreams with a playful twist! Dream big, laugh louder! 🌟🛌

New funny dreaming quotes 👇

All funny dreaming quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

39 shares on Reddit this month:

My hobbies include adding things to my cart, and never buying them.

76 shares on X this month:

All the smart people at the office are worried about being replaced by A.I., but not me. I’m safe until they invent Artificial Stupidity.

76 shares on X this month:

I need a massage for my brain.

84 shares on Pinterest this month:

Remember when we were young and said “I’ll sleep when i’m older”? Well, now we can’t when we want to.

100 shares on X this month:

I’m going to write a book about all the things I should have done with my life. l’ll call it my oughtabiography.

43 shares on X this month:

Sometimes I wonder if the strangers I see when I go outside are actually the people I talk to online.

39 shares on YouTube this month:

Cracking the ice cubes out probably feels so good for the ice tray.

14 shares on Pinterest this month:

A swear jar for Twitter would end world hunger.

83 shares on Discord this month:

Blocking someone isn’t enough, I also want them to get lice.

48 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I am convinced that size matters, especially when it comes to the heart.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Who called it a heatwave and not a temperature tantrum?

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish we were cats so you could just randomly slap co-workers for no reason.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m getting to the age where it’s rude to pull out a bottle of ibuprofen if I don’t have enough for everyone.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Wearing a condom while she’s on birth control is called two-factor authentication.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I may join the cicadas this summer and just scream for six weeks straight.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

When the devil couldn’t reach me, he made my brain my biggest enemy.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Please stop fighting with each other on the internet and start fighting with each other in real life. Life is short.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Sending your selfies to NASA because you’re a star.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Pretending to be a well-adjusted, functioning adult is so exhausting.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

When you wish you could tell someone that won’t stop talking “Okay, we’re out of time today”, just like a therapist.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,608

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

I need to go back to Friday. I want to do my weekend differently.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

“Your sock has a hole in it!” Yeah, no shit, that’s how I get my foot in there.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

Whoever invented the gender reveal party needs to be launched into the sun.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

My favorite part about having a Peloton is telling people I have a Peloton.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

Maybe one day a street will be named after me. Or a school. Or a mental hospital.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

Who else here can say that they have NEVER watched any of the Kardashian shows?

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

Inflation is actually a good thing, it means money is going viral.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

I like my bed more than I like most people.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has copied:

The only thing limiting what you can put in a sandwich is your imagination and the laws of physics.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

Mashed potatoes are just German guacamole.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Instagram:

Farts are just the ghosts of the things we eat.

Making waves on WeChat:

I wish there were an option to turn off the Wi-Fi connection for WhatsApp only.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I’m not ready to adopt a highway, I can barely raise my own driveway.

Breaking via Threads:

I told the trees what you did. Be wary when you enter the forest next.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

A bad relationship can ruin a good song.

Seen just now on Facebook:

So annoying when your family knocks on the toilet door and asks what you’re doing. I’m baking a cake. HBU?

Live now on Telegram:

My teen believed the washing machine when it said it only had one minute left, and oh, how I laughed and laughed.

Breaking via Messenger:

I heard a mouse yesterday. So now I loudly announce myself whenever I enter a dark room. In case you’re wondering how brave I am.

Just landed via Reddit:

Enjoying the consequences of my actions.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

I would just once like to feel as powerful as a toddler throwing their sippy cup whilst sitting atop their high chair.

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