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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

I’ll find a cell mate before I’ll ever find a soulmate.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

How long do you actually have to wear a muscle shirt until you get muscles?

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

I need to go back to Friday. I want to do my weekend differently.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

This Monday could have been an email.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

At what point is a salad no longer a salad based on how much bacon I add?

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

Overthinkaholic!

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

Have you tried complaining about it?

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

There’s no better feeling than coming home and immediately changing into your Adam Sandler fit.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

Every time you break spaghetti noodles in half, an Italian has a stroke.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

Can I get back all those naps I refused to take as a kid? I could really use them now.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,709

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Have you ever wanted to grab somebody by the shoulders, give them a good shake and whisper “Nobody cares!”

Trending via Messenger:

Congress taking an entire month off in a country where most people don’t get more than 2 weeks’ vacation is awesome.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Don’t judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

A coffee the size of Manhattan please.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

It’s so embarrassing when you make a silly face at a baby, and they do not care at all.

Trending via Slack:

What age do you learn to cook pasta for one and not for a whole village? Asking for a friend.

Just landed via WeChat:

Y’all scared to be single, I’m scared to be in another pointless relationship.

Just shared via Slack:

I can’t stand when people need constant validation online. Like, comment, and share if you agree.

Making waves on TikTok:

Whoever’s been in charge of the weather for the last few weeks seems to have fallen asleep on the couch with the remote control in their hand.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

There are only two kinds of people, and I avoid them both.

Funny grocery list quotes

Funny grocery list quotes bring a splash of laughter to your everyday errands 🛒😂. Whether you’re juggling snacks, veggies, or that “forgot-again” item, these witty sayings turn boring lists into chuckle-worthy moments 🥦🍕. Perfect for sharing with fellow foodies or brightening up your fridge, get ready to make grocery shopping way more fun and less of a chore! 🛍️✨

New funny grocery list quotes 👇

All funny grocery list quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

77 shares on WeChat this month:

I would prefer not to.

22 shares on Facebook this month:

Do you know how much trauma it took to be this funny?

91 shares on WeChat this month:

Sorry I’m late, my dog was sleeping in the shape of a donut and I had to take so many photos.

33 shares on Discord this month:

Time needs a speed limit.

97 shares on Instagram this month:

I don’t know the difference between “gray” & “grey” and I’m too scared to even ask.

82 shares on Telegram this month:

Just blocked all the ugly people, so if you see this… what’s up, big sexy?

57 shares on WeChat this month:

Billionaires are so weird. What are you saving up for? Hell?

58 shares on Facebook this month:

Somehow I picked the worst possible decade to try to have a career.

29 shares on Facebook this month:

People moaning and making noise over food makes me so livid I can’t keep it in.

80 shares on WeChat this month:

Never trust a wet fart.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t just hold a grudge; I love it, pet it, feed it and take it for long walks on the beach.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Potatoes make French fries, chips and vodka. It’s like the other vegetables aren’t even trying.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

A shark could swim faster than me, but I could probably run faster than a shark. So, in a triathlon, it would all come down to who is the better cyclist.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Actually, you’re having a conversation with yourself. I’m just here so you don’t appear totally insane.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

The most unrealistic part of cooking shows is when they have enough room in their fridge to fit an entire baking sheet.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

If you’re ever wondering what to do in an uncomfortable situation, just think “What would teenage me do?” And then do the opposite of that.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Fun fact: Did you know that removing junk food from your diet can help you lose up to 90% of your will to live?

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Thinking after a concert that the artist liked your city/show the most is like thinking the bartender flirted with you.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Anytime someone throws a Great Gatsby themed party, I have to assume they never finished the book.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Have an early flight tomorrow, so naturally I’m going to stay up late tonight and be weird in my room.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,523

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇯 has shared:

A recent study showed that people who are reading this text thought they were learning something useful.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

To all the people who ask singles why they are actually single: Please don’t. We have sworn an oath and are not allowed to tell you the secret of our success.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

Sorry I left you on read, I didn’t mean to open it just yet.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

The best part about being single is sleeping around. You can sleep all over that bed of yours – left, right, middle.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

You ever want someone so bad it pisses you off a little.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

I’m sorry your man wears his sunglasses on the back of his head.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

Made the mistake of believing what I was told again.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

Better to be a wolf that everyone hates, than a donkey that everyone rides.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

Biblical loophole: It’s not premarital sex if you never intend to get married.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

Patience: something you have when there are too many witnesses around.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

Whoever is writing my Rom-Com, can you maybe, I don’t know, START IT?

Freshly posted on Slack:

Socialism is like polio, it comes back when people forget about the horrible damage it did last time.

Going bananas on Discord:

Welcome to your 40s: here’s ten pounds.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Nothing can break the bond between me and peanut butter.

Going bananas on Telegram:

The difference between a hippo and a zippo is that one is really heavy and the other is a little lighter. Thank you and good night.

Making waves on Instagram:

I just want someone who can see through all my bullshit and hate me for who I really am.

Trending via WeChat:

I noticed my mouse problem is back an I yelled at my cats for being lazy and not doing their job, like I was in a Tom and Jerry cartoon.

Live now on Pinterest:

Nothing ruins your weekend faster than remembering Monday is lurking in the shadows.

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

April Fool’s next week and still no one has asked me to be their fool.

Breaking via YouTube:

Don’t be part of the problem. Be all of it.

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