Commentary:
"Oh deer, I totally get it now! 🚗💨🦌 Running from adulthood like… 😂"
101 Funny older quotes
The older I get, the less surprised I’d be if a random body part just fell off one day.
Commentary:
"Ah, the joys of aging gracefully – losing body parts along the way 🤷♂️ Just remember to pick 'em up if you find 'em! 🦵🔜🙈"
Listen kid, I have social media profiles older than you.
Commentary:
"Listen kid, I have social media profiles older than you. 📱💁♂️ Back in my day, we had to manually type in HTML codes for our MySpace layouts! 😂 #ThrowbackThursday"
I don’t know much, but I know this: the older you get, the faster the number of things you’re willing to wait in line for approaches zero.
Commentary:
Getting older is basically a quest to avoid all lines. Next stop: teleportation! 🚶♂️➡️🏠✨
As I get older, I’m understanding why everything needs to be done before 12 p.m.
Commentary:
Getting things done before noon is like performing magic: still requires a wand, but at least you’re awake to wave it! 🧙♂️☕✨
The older I get, the more I understand why witches lived alone in the woods.
Commentary:
Embracing my inner witch vibes, because who needs noisy neighbors when you can have chatty squirrels? 🌲🧙♀️✨
My intern was born in 2007. I have unread emails older than that.
Commentary:
Time to archive those emails before they start asking for a driver's license! 📧🚗🤦♀️
I used to be a night owl, but as I’ve gotten older, I’ve become more of a person who doesn’t function at any time.
Commentary:
Who knew aging turns you into a 24/7 malfunctioning robot? 🤖😴
My advice to young people to prepare for getting older is to start stretching immediately.
Commentary:
Just signed up for a stretching class—consider it an investment in my future flexibility stock! 🤸♀️📈😂
TVs are like, literally, the only thing that has gotten cheaper as I’ve gotten older.
Commentary:
Is it just me, or are TVs the only things defying inflation laws like it's Black Friday every day? 📺💸😅