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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

People who work in customer service should be allowed to fight one customer a day. Two on Fridays.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

If I complain about being out of shape, I don’t actually want fitness tips and workouts to try. I just want to complain and remain out of shape. What is wrong with you people?

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

I get it, sauce, I also thicken over time.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

I love going “Streets are saying” before I say something I literally just made up.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has viewed:

It’s all fun and games until you send the clapping emoji instead of the prayer hands when commenting on the news of a death in the family.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has shared:

When I was a kid, they played lame music for middle-aged people in the supermarket, but this morning at Whole Foods, it’s now all amazing bangers from my youth.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

Nothing in a household is said more lovingly than, “Can you bring me some toilet paper?”

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

You don’t have to be crazy to be friends with me. I also train people.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

“I’m gonna decide everyone’s pronouns and sexuality tonight. And, yes, there will be some big surprises.”

Someone from 🇬🇩 has viewed:

I’d be really slim if it wasn’t for birthdays, anniversaries, Easter, Christmas, Mother’s Day, weekends and me.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,711

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on X:

Getting paid to sleep would be such a dream job.

Spotted on Instagram:

Sorry, can you repeat what you said? I didn’t have my glasses on.

Shared recently on Instagram:

My New Year’s resolution is to emit a powerful beam of light.

Trending via Twitch:

Adulthood is realising no one cares about you, and the show must go on.

Just landed via Messenger:

I haven’t lost my virginity because I never lose.

Trending via WhatsApp:

The new American dream is an alien invasion.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

I could post “hello” and there’d be a 20 day argument in the comments.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Lord, remove any laziness from my body and push me to my full potential the rest of this year.

Trending via Instagram:

Every day we get closer and closer to Idiocracy coming true.

Just shared via Slack:

Demi Lovato is short for demilitarized love potato.

Funny Pokémon quotes

Funny Pokémon quotes bring a spark of joy and laughter to every Trainer’s day! 😂✨ Whether you’re battling Gym Leaders or just chilling with Pikachu, these witty lines capture the quirky charm of the Pokémon world. Get ready to giggle, reminisce, and share some epic moments that prove Pokémon isn’t just about catching ’em all—it’s about having fun along the way! ⚡🐾🎉

New funny Pokémon quotes 👇

If Pokémon were real, state fairs would serve them deep fried on a stick.

1 week ago

activity, deep, deep fried, fair, food, fried, fun, fun activity, humor, novelty, Pokémon, real, satire, state, stick
Break-up so bad, he blocked me on Pokémon Go.

1 week ago

bad, blocked, break up, breakup, gaming, Go, humor, me, Pokémon, relationship
My kids have been joking for weeks about a new Pokémon called Puke-Achu and then they got the stomach flu and brought it to life.

2 weeks ago

flu, humor, illness, joke, joking, kids, life, new, parenting, Pokémon, Puke-Achu, stomach, stomach flu, weeks
Where did you come from, Where did you go, Where did you come from, Pokémon Go.

2 weeks ago

adventure, catchphrase, culture, game, humor, nostalgia, Pokémon, pop, pop culture, where
My eye doctor is alarmingly young and when he said he thought I had a chalazion or a hordoleum, I thought he might be referencing Pokémon.

3 weeks ago

chalazion, doctor, eye, eye doctor, eye health, health, hordoleum, humor, medical, medical humor, Pokémon, young, young doctor

All funny Pokémon quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

38 shares on Threads this month:

“Unavailable” is my favorite state to be in.

90 shares on LinkedIn this month:

You are what you eat! (If anyone needed more encouragement to eat the rich.)

98 shares on Pinterest this month:

You were there at the beginning of the Internet if you’ve heard the following: “Get off the web, I need to make a call!”

59 shares on Twitch this month:

Now I know why my dad used to wake up at 4AM and just sit at the kitchen table for an hour.

58 shares on LinkedIn this month:

You know IT have given up when the error message reads, ‘Something went wrong’.

23 shares on Instagram this month:

You just can’t live a full life on an empty stomach.

44 shares on Twitch this month:

I like deadlines. They make me functional.

82 shares on Discord this month:

My hobbies include saying, “I’m so tired,” and then staying up for three more hours doing nothing.

45 shares on Telegram this month:

Inventing the Grinch: “Santa needs a Wario!”

49 shares on Instagram this month:

People who work in customer service should be allowed to fight one customer a day. Two on Fridays.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

If alcohol was the one that was banned instead of weed, then a lot of people would have had memories of hungry, stoned fathers instead of angry, drunk ones.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Relationship status: I’m the only one wearing my hoodies.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Winter hack: Avoid the cold by never leaving your house.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

When I like a song, I repeat it until the artist comes out and ask for water.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Sex so good, my left hand is making my right hand a sandwich.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I would never put up a lost dog poster. I’m not letting the whole neighborhood know I fumbled.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Tears for Fears: Everybody wants to rule the world. Me: Some of us just want eight hours of uninterrupted sleep.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Now that I have a standing desk, I’m adding manual labor to my resume.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s not you. Just the things you say, think, and do.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

No, I don’t want to read the article first, I want to argue now.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,554

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇬 has bookmarked:

Kids be like, I see you have a moment to yourself, and I must correct that immediately.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Sorry, can’t go out tonight. My bed told me it needs me, and I can’t let it down.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

God: “I don’t regret the Flood, but I do regret the Ark.”

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

I don’t just hold a grudge; I love it, pet it, feed it and take it for long walks on the beach.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has shared:

It’s so hot, I just saw a squirrel fanning its nuts.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

I love being an adult and sitting absolutely still and suddenly I’ve hurt my neck somehow.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

I start off my mornings with coffee and low expectations.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

King Kong should’ve been able to find a better place to hide than the top of the tallest building in the middle of New York City.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has shared:

I hope my parents feel proud. They scared me so bad about getting pregnant as a teenager that now they’re never getting grandkids.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

I hope Google never goes down. I know like six, maybe seven, things.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Reddit:

Maybe dogs are smarter than us because they found a way to get fed and housed without having to go to college and get a job.

Shared recently on X:

My only plan for this weekend is to move just enough so the people don’t think I’m dead.

Spotted on YouTube:

Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

Shared recently on X:

I didn’t buy that thing I wanted but didn’t need, so I celebrated by buying a different thing I wanted but didn’t need.

Spotted on TikTok:

If you don’t have anything nice to say, sign up for Twitter.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Can someone please help me, I’m still at the Fyre Festival.

Just shared via Twitch:

Need a book club for people who all just happened to read the same book but hated it and now need to vent.

Making waves on WeChat:

I don’t care if I’m standing in the window, if I said I ain’t home, I ain’t home.

Seen just now on Threads:

“In a galaxy far, far away” is starting to sound quite enticing.

Going bananas on Threads:

I actually think it’s quite beautiful that you have to be the one to save yourself.

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