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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡± has viewed:

Always do sober what you said you’d do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡» has viewed:

If you bring an acoustic guitar to a bonfire, I’m going to assume it’s for fuel.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡· has downloaded:

Not to brag, but I don’t need alcohol to send texts I’ll regret.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡§ has viewed:

I’ve never met a problem I couldn’t make worse.

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡ͺ has bookmarked:

Just spoke to my wife while the internet was down. She seems nice. She’s a nurse apparently.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡Ί has copied:

It’s never too early to start making bad decisions.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡¨ has bookmarked:

Most men don’t actually want to do things; they just want to talk about doing them.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡§ has viewed:

When people ask me what is more important, food or love, I don’t answer because I’m eating.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ί has shared:

I have to pee. Story of my life.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡Ώ has bookmarked:

Never mind a Roomba, I need a robot garbage can that will follow my kids around the house all day.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

1890 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,052

Funny Quotes Topics

14,836

Funny Quotes Images

12,052

Updated

1 minute ago

Users Online

3,435

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Nobody plays better together than siblings being told it’s bedtime.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

What’s a polite way to tell someone you hope they get mauled by a bear?

Trending via Threads:

I don’t care what other people think of me, at least mosquitoes find me attractive.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

There are 400 billion stars in our galaxy and perhaps two trillion galaxies in total, and I just wonder if Miss Universe fully understands her achievement.

Freshly posted on Threads:

My favorite thing to do on the weekend is not leave my house.

Making waves on Reddit:

Sucks how every girl I’m interested in is either taken or has good taste in men.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Forget carrying me to bed; carry me to the end of the workweek. Then we can talk.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

If you sweat while you eat, it should count as a workout.

Just shared via YouTube:

I don’t drink coffee all the time. I take breaks in between to make another one.

Making waves on Discord:

I don’t understand, but I also don’t care… so it works out.

Home Β» Funny Rise Quotes

Funny rise quotes

Funny rise quotes β˜€οΈπŸ˜‚ are the perfect way to kickstart your day with a smile! Whether you’re a morning person or a snooze-button pro, these witty gems will have you laughing your way out of bed. Ready to turn those early yawns into chuckles? Let’s rise and shine with a sprinkle of humor that makes mornings anything but boring! πŸŒ…πŸ˜„βœ¨

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For even more funny rise quotes, check out the next page, if available πŸ‘‡

All funny rise quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes πŸ‘Œ

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! πŸ˜‰βœŒοΈ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. πŸ˜‚πŸ’₯

Trending Funny Quotes πŸ“ˆ

Hot Funny Quotes πŸ”₯

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

1890 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,052

Funny Quotes Topics

14,836

Funny Quotes Images

12,052

Updated

1 minute ago

Users Online

3,427

Funny Quotes of the Month πŸš€

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡¦ has viewed:

That β€œso we done?” be saving the relationship every time.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡Ώ has shared:

Just blocked all the ugly people, so if you see this… what’s up, big sexy?

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡Ό has bookmarked:

Sitting next to you on an empty train and clicking my stopwatch every time you turn a page in your book.

Someone from πŸ‡ΎπŸ‡ͺ has viewed:

Sometimes I just want someone to hug me and say “I know it’s hard, but you’ll be okay. Here’s a coffee and a million dollars.”

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡Έ has shared:

Wine shopping is 10% grape variety and 90% β€œooohh, this one has a pretty label.”

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡¦ has shared:

As a Dad, you always want your kids to be prepared for real life, that’s why trolling them is so vital.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡Ό has bookmarked:

If the earth is so flat, explain why cats haven’t pushed everything off it yet. You can’t.

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡² has shared:

They should make a movie that’s good the whole way through.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡¬ has viewed:

I’m like the Temu version of a well-functioning adult.

Someone from πŸ‡³πŸ‡± has viewed:

I hate it when people threaten to come over. Now I’ve got to do 2 years of housework in 30 minutes.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Going viral on Instagram:

You’re so cultured I’mma start calling you Yogurt.

Breaking via Threads:

I love that cats slap the shit out of everything they can’t understand.

Just landed via Threads:

I’m pretty sure my husband’s favorite sound is the oven range fan turning on when I start making dinner.

Reported on Messenger:

Cats have 32 muscles in each ear, to help them ignore you.

Trending via LinkedIn:

JFK is the perfect name for this airport because it’s a bloody headache.

Breaking via Twitch:

Imagine a refund on all the money you spent on alcohol.

Trending via Telegram:

Idea: An app that tells you where that bruise came from.

Spotted on TikTok:

β€œFries or salad?” sums up every adult decision you have to make.

Spotted on Threads:

Who needs dystopian fiction when you can watch the news?

Seen just now on Messenger:

Cats love to wake you up and go back to sleep. It’s part of their culture.

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