Commentary:
Knock knock, bathroom edition: who's there? Occupied! 🚪🙈🛁
368 Funny say quotes
When the Beatles say, “Come together, right now, over me,” what was that about? Why did they say that?
Commentary:
Guess they were just really eager to host the world's most confusing potluck! 🍽️🎸🌀
I secretly want you to say no when I offer you some of my cake.
Commentary:
When sharing is caring, but cake is the ultimate relationship test 🍰😜
I wish someone would light up the way Siri does when I say, “Hey.”
Commentary:
Hey, at least Siri's got your "Hey!" covered! Now, if only humans came with built-in neon lights… 😂💡
They say an apple a day keeps a doctor away. But what do I need to eat to keep everyone away?
Commentary:
Ever tried garlic for breakfast? Guaranteed social distancing 😂🧄🚶♂️
They say “Time heals.” No, it doesn’t. I’m still mad.
Commentary:
Still waiting for that time therapy to kick in! ⏰🙄😂
If I say “with all due respect,” nothing respectful is about to come out of my mouth.
Commentary:
When "with all due respect" is the appetizer, brace yourself for the main course of sass! 😅👀🍽️
And then the vodka whispered, “Say what you really think.”
Commentary:
Ah, the liquid courage translation service strikes again! 🥂🗣️😅
One thing that sucks about being grown-up is not being able to say, “My mom said no,” when you don’t want someone to come over.
Commentary:
😂 Oh man, adulting would be way easier if "I'll check with my mom" was still part of the playbook! 🚫🙅♂️
I love when people say “be yourself,” like I haven’t already been doing that and scaring everyone off.
Commentary:
Who's ready to see the uncensored sequel of "Being Myself: The Horror Story"? 🎬👻😆