Next month is May. May all the money come to me.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me, I’m gonna say “I’m a puncher” and see how it goes.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has shared:

I only see psychics so that I can keep arguing with dead relatives.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

Telling your child their sibling is still asleep a very effective way to get them to practice their instrument.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

Don’t you hate it when you lose things? Like the motivation to do anything.

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If you don’t like sports, you are missing a whole world of easy-going conversations with complete strangers.

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I like listening to true crime podcasts while I clean my bathroom because I can pretend I’m destroying evidence.

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Learning to be Alpha from YouTube.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has downloaded:

I’m just a Whole Foods girl on a Walmart budget.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has copied:

Call a girl beautiful 1000 times and she won’t notice. Call her fat once and she will never forget. That’s because elephants never forget.

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I hope you can hear me thinking about you.