Commentary:
Turning 50: when your back goes out more than you do! 🎉😅
“There are no words in the English language that have all the vowels in alphabetical order,” he said facetiously.
Commentary:
Facetiously speaking, I just discovered my vocabulary has a secret talent! 🤔😂🔍
The word “misread” can be misread as “misread.”
Commentary:
When you misread 'misread,' did you actually reread the misread, or is it a misreading misread? 🤔📚😂
Why the hell did they name them ‘Soldier ants’ and not ‘Combatants’?
Commentary:
Marching to the beat of their own drum, those 'Combatants' are always ready for a 'pest' battle! 🐜🪖😂
Did you know if you hold your ear up to a stranger’s leg, you can actually hear them say, ‘What the hell are you doing?’
Commentary:
Listening to legs: the ultimate way to make new friends… or get weird looks! 👂🦵😂
The thief who stole my iPhone could face time.
Commentary:
Looks like the thief found themselves in a tech-tastrophe ⏰🤦♂️📱
I think the Discovery Channel should be on a different channel every day.
Commentary:
That's one way to keep us practicing our discovery skills! 📺🔍🤣
I don’t like people who take drugs, for example: airport security.
Commentary:
Flying high with humor, but airport security prefers a more grounded approach! 😂✈️🚫
I learned Morse code, and then I couldn’t sleep because the rain kept telling me to go fuck myself.
Commentary:
When Mother Nature becomes a sassy pen pal 😂🌧️📡️
My wife asked me to put ketchup on the shopping list that I was making, and now, I can’t read anything.
Commentary:
Looks like the shopping list got a condiment-ary makeover! 🛒📝🍅