Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

The world is in chaos, confess to your crush!

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

Everyone should be more grateful for what I don’t say.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Mixing 1% milk and 2% milk to create the forbidden 1.72% milk.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has shared:

Who called it girl math and not galgebra?

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

No offense, fellas, we love compliments, but a compliment from another woman means just a little bit more.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

Maybe the elephant doesn’t want to be addressed, and we should respect their boundaries.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

The price of groceries has gotten me thinking about what acorns taste like.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

A Twitter swear jar could end world hunger.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

Real introverts are too introverted to tell people they’re introverts.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

The worst thing you can do when you notice your kids are playing nicely together is telling them that they’re playing nicely together.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,516

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

A narcissist wants the authority of a king while having the accountability of a toddler.

Just landed via Twitch:

I just shaved my legs and man, the next 7 minutes and 34 seconds before it starts growing back is gonna feel amazing.

Just landed via Discord:

How do I get someone to unknow me? I no longer want to be known by these people.

Just shared via YouTube:

In case of a disaster, women and children are being evacuated first so men can think about a solution in peace.

Trending via Facebook:

If I go quiet, it’s because I am plotting my escape or your demise.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

“You never reply to messages.” I am just one person, okay? I am understaffed.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I came, I saw, I took a selfie as proof that I came and saw.

Breaking via Snapchat:

Come on, karma, do your job.

Trending via Telegram:

I don’t have an advent calendar, so I’m just opening cupboard doors and eating what’s in there.

Spotted on TikTok:

A haunted house, but it’s just a room full of people asking you to tell them a fun fact about yourself.

That masculine urge to completely avoid relationships until you get your life together.

4 weeks ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
When your life's a work in progress but you're still waiting for the patch update 😂🚧 #RelationshipPatchNotes

avoid, avoidance, dating, growth, humor, life, masculine, masculine urge, personal, personal growth, relationship, relationships, together, urge

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

It’s crazy how social media convinced us that 15 likes aren’t enough. Imagine 15 people in real life telling you that you looked good.

0

2 months ago

comparison, compliments, convinced, crazy, culture, enough, good, imagine, life, likes, media, online, online culture, people, real, real life, self-esteem, self-worth, social, social comparison, social media, telling, us, validation, virtual, virtual validation
You want to know how old you really feel? Stop drinking caffeine and popping Ibuprofen. Then, just wait.

0

2 months ago

age, caffeine, drinking, feel, feeling, humor, ibuprofen, just, know, life, old, popping, self-awareness, stop, wait, want
I’ve already picked out my sweatpants for New Year’s Eve.

1

2 months ago

casual, celebration, comfort, eve, humor, new, New Year’s Eve, outfit, relaxation, sweatpant, sweatpants, year’s
Ever thought about centaurs and how the bottom half would start walking immediately after birth but the top part would be baby-like and flop around for a while.

0

2 months ago

after, anatomy, animal, around, baby, birth, bottom, centaur, ever, flop, half, humor, imagination, start, thought, top, walking
They should invent a rom-com where no one has to overhear anything that leads to a huge unnecessary misunderstanding.

0

2 months ago

anything, comedy, humor, invention, misunderstanding, overhear, plot, plot twist, relationship, rom-com, should, twist, where
If you want to complain about my driving at least calm down and get off my hood first.

0

2 months ago

calm, calm down, complain, driving, hood, humor, least, road, safety, sarcasm, want

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

18 shares on Threads this month:

Getting stoned when you have a cat is awesome because it will just walk in and I’m immediately cracking up. Like, look at this dude, I bloody love this guy.

81 shares on Telegram this month:

I’ve never met a cake I didn’t want to fork.

70 shares on YouTube this month:

I want to live in a world where TV sitcoms have catchy theme songs again.

39 shares on X this month:

Don’t blame the alcohol. You were an idiot before you started drinking.

62 shares on Twitch this month:

Going to ask seven friends for advice and then execute my original plan.

86 shares on Slack this month:

If you want to make your mother proud, make her my mother-in-law.

11 shares on Reddit this month:

I am brilliantly social for one and a half hours, and then I need to recover in my bedroom cave for two days.

22 shares on YouTube this month:

Boxes of pasta don’t need a plastic window. I believe pasta is in the box.

17 shares on Slack this month:

You’re mistaking me with someone who’s stupid.

61 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Opening this app is like lighting a cigarette.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

If you ever think English is not a weird language just remember that read and lead rhyme and read and lead rhyme. But read and lead don’t rhyme, and neither do read and lead.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

I need a new hobby that costs zero dollars and takes up 100% of my free time. So far, all I’ve come up with is mowing the lawn.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has copied:

Take your days off, these jobs don’t care about you.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

One week of daily crunches and I have abs…urdly underestimated how long it will take to see results.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

I don’t even want a new year this year. I’ll take a lightly used 2006, if it’s available.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has bookmarked:

You hit a couple of curbs, take out a trash can and all of a sudden it’s “you can’t drive”.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has viewed:

How many jokes about lightbulbs does it take to change us?

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

People that ask Grok “Is this true” are the reason our society is getting dumber by the minute.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

I once broke up with a guy because he ate half my french fries, and when I get really lonely, I still think about those french fries.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

That moment when rappers mispronounce a word just to make it rhyme.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

A late person is never happier than when the person they’re meeting is later than them.

Breaking via Reddit:

One pretty important part of being a dad is walking faster than the rest of your family through an airport.

Shared recently on Twitch:

“Stop overthinking.” Oh, wow. Hadn’t considered that. Solved.

Shared recently on Instagram:

You know you’re old when you you barely do anything all day, but still need a nap to continue doing barely anything.

Going viral on Instagram:

My only goal in life is to never end up on a Netflix documentary.

Trending via Instagram:

Why does the phone ring longer when you’re ignoring the call?

Spotted on Telegram:

Every frozen pizza is a canvas that needs an artist’s touch.

Just landed via YouTube:

Every time I leave the house, I’m reminded why sweatpants exist.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I’ve been asked to join a swingers club, but I’m a little nervous. What if I’m not good enough? I haven’t been on a swing since I was 9.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Sorry, I’m late. I sat on my bed in a towel for 45 minutes, staring at the wall.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

That masculine urge to completely avoid relationships until you get your life together.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

It’s crazy how social media convinced us that 15 likes aren’t enough. Imagine 15 people in real life telling you that you looked good.

You want to know how old you really feel? Stop drinking caffeine and popping Ibuprofen. Then, just wait.

I’ve already picked out my sweatpants for New Year’s Eve.

Ever thought about centaurs and how the bottom half would start walking immediately after birth but the top part would be baby-like and flop around for a while.

They should invent a rom-com where no one has to overhear anything that leads to a huge unnecessary misunderstanding.

If you want to complain about my driving at least calm down and get off my hood first.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨