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Commentary:
"Facing your credit card bill after a shopping spree is like staring fear in the face… but scarier! 😱💳💸 Who needs haunted houses when you can check your bank balance? 💀😂 #ScaryFinances"

anxiety, bill, card, credit, credit card, debt, finance, humor, joke, me, scare

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Mario Kart gave me unrealistic expectations of how banana peels affect traffic.

0

2 months ago

banana, expectation, expectations, game, humor, Kart, Mario, Mario Kart, me, peel, racing, traffic, unrealistic
It’s like ten thousand views when all you need is a like.

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2 months ago

engagement, frustration, humor, media, metrics, need, popularity, social, social media, ten, views
It’s not too early to go to sleep. Too early only applies to waking up.

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2 months ago

early, humor, night, rest, sleep, waking
I love when I come home, I put on my Adam Sandler clothes.

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5 months ago

Adam, Adam Sandler, celebrity, clothes, clothing, comfort, home, humor, i, love, outfit, put, sandler
No matter how sad their story is, don’t let anybody move into your house.

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2 months ago

advice, boundary, house, humor, let, matter, move, move in, sad, sad story, story
90s scientists: we cloned a sheep. we landed a robot on mars. Scientists today: for the last time, the earth is round.

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2 months ago

90s, cloning, Earth, flat earth, Flat Earther, humor, last, Mars, robot, round, science, scientists, sheep, time, today

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

50 shares on Messenger this month:

Self-checkout is amazing for introverts until the machine breaks and two employees have to come fix it while you wait.

37 shares on YouTube this month:

They just don’t put milkshakes in the yard like they used to.

25 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The best way to contact me is to meet me in my dreams at 3 a.m.

68 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I dare you to try and be more single than me.

67 shares on Twitch this month:

There are real people living amongst us who pay for Discord Nitro.

21 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Getting older means talking to less people and complaining about more people.

55 shares on Telegram this month:

Sorry, can’t make it, just remembered I don’t want to.

97 shares on TikTok this month:

After my death, I’ll be very busy. The list of people to whom I want to appear as a ghost is getting longer every day.

43 shares on Pinterest this month:

Just because I loved you at one point doesn’t mean I will always love you. I’m not Whitney Houston.

11 shares on Telegram this month:

The toughest part of being a vegan is keeping it to yourself.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

Having a crush on someone is just having a lack of information on someone.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Worst part of being in my 20’s is to be reminded that I’m actually in my mid-40’s.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

“You let your cat on the bed?” I would put her on my life insurance.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has shared:

Reading for pleasure implies the existence of reading for pain. They’re calling it a PhD.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

Have we checked all food to see if exploding it makes it into something better or did we just stop with corn?

Someone from 🇬🇦 has downloaded:

Will someone please make me drink some water and limit my screen time?

Someone from 🇯🇴 has viewed:

Got fired on my first day working at the drugstore for calling my new coworkers ‘my pharmily’.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

I dreamed I won the lottery, so you can imagine how thrilled I was to wake up and get ready for work.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

In hell, you wait for a ‘verify your email address’ email that never arrives.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on YouTube:

Who needs an alarm clock when you have a bladder.

Making waves on Threads:

Striking gold in your 40s: finding a close parking spot that’s in the shade on a hot summer day.

Just landed via TikTok:

“You’re not allowed to be grumpy on a Friday, it’s in the fine print somewhere.”

Live now on Threads:

When I say someone is a good doctor, it’s entirely based on the strength of their waiting room Wi-Fi.

Shared recently on Telegram:

Before I start seeing a psychiatrist, does anyone like me crazy?

Spotted on Instagram:

Sorry I missed your call 8 months ago. Is everything okay?

Breaking via Messenger:

It’s weird that Usher doesn’t have any songs about showing people to their seats.

Just shared via WeChat:

These days I just accept the website cookies without any protest. Website is like Grandma, I’m not gonna fight with her.

Trending via Telegram:

I get so crabby when strangers waste my time which is unfair to them because I waste almost all of my own time to begin with.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I’m not deleting my Twitter, I was here before Elon.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

You can’t scare me; you’re not my credit card bill.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Mario Kart gave me unrealistic expectations of how banana peels affect traffic.

It’s like ten thousand views when all you need is a like.

It’s not too early to go to sleep. Too early only applies to waking up.

I love when I come home, I put on my Adam Sandler clothes.

No matter how sad their story is, don’t let anybody move into your house.

90s scientists: we cloned a sheep. we landed a robot on mars. Scientists today: for the last time, the earth is round.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨