Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

Noise-canceling headphones aren’t enough, I need everyone to shut up.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

I always stop the microwave before it beeps because it’s not the boss of me.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has viewed:

Did we do it, did we save the daylight?

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

That awkward moment when you gently throw your phone onto your bed and it decides to bounce off 3 walls, knock over a lamp, and land on the floor.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

My girlfriend? You wouldn’t know her, she’s in a different data center.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

I don’t think either person should pay for the first date. It should be on the house.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

I’ll marry your mom just so I can ground you.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

If stores want to accurately display clothes for people over 40, the mannequins should be laying on a couch.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

“I asked ChatGPT,” “I asked Grok,” yeah, well, I wipe away the hours conversing with the flowers.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

Stretching my back isn’t enough; I need to take out my spine and wring it out like a towel.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Jan 31, 2026

3,574

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Reddit:

Opinions are like air fryers. Everyone’s got one and they won’t stop banging on about them.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I don’t care if it’s cliché, I will always enjoy a ‘small town but something messed up is happening’ story.

Just shared via Instagram:

Being a writer means canceling your plans so you have time to write, and then spending hours avoiding writing.

Spotted on Pinterest:

You either get a kid who eats like a bottomless pit, or you get one that when asked what they want for lunch answers “No thanks, I had lunch yesterday.”

Freshly posted on Facebook:

You should be allowed to speed if good music is playing.

Live now on WhatsApp:

Unloading the dishwasher in the opposite direction just to feel something.

Shared recently on Slack:

Imagine hating me while I’m just over here being lazy and minding my own business.

Seen just now on X:

Sometimes a man’s purpose is to simply remind you again and again that you’d be just fine on your own.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Every time I see an odd screw on the floor somewhere, I think one of my loose ones has finally come out.

Just shared via Reddit:

Cleaning the kitchen, but saw the laundry, so I watered a plant, and now I’m making a dentist appointment.

Can you check if my lips taste like cherries?

2 days ago

Humorous text asking if lips taste like cherries, playful and witty vibe.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
🍒 “Ah, the classic ‘subtle’ way to confirm if your lip balm is on point or if you’ve been enjoying too many cherry-flavored snacks! No need for a taste test, just ask a friend – or risk confusing the next person you chat with!” 😉👄

check, cherry, date, flirt, humor, lips, taste

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

89 shares on Reddit this month:

Establish dominance over your children by whining louder.

45 shares on Threads this month:

The only thing preventing me from moving to Finland is the language barrier and a job.

90 shares on Twitch this month:

Just gonna drink light beers today, because I don’t wanna get drunk but I do enjoy peeing 30 times.

13 shares on X this month:

Quitting my job to focus on staying inside.

96 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I only sleep so my phone can get the night off.

89 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m sorry I don’t take orders. I barely take suggestions.

20 shares on Threads this month:

Babe, wake up, it’s stupid outside!

78 shares on Pinterest this month:

Instead of studying, I like to stay on my phone and worry about how I’m going to pass.

89 shares on Slack this month:

And where did Mr. Pepper receive his degree from exactly?

63 shares on Slack this month:

I was gonna get on the treadmill, but then the couch will get sad.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I love one-pot recipes. So much less mess than when I was trying to cook things without a pot.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

There should be an opposite of Valentine’s Day where you post Instagram photos of your enemy.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m just going to be hotter. It’s easier than being nicer.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Being awake is the worst.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Waitress: “Do you have any questions about the menu?” Me: “What kind of font is this?

10 folks are currently checking 👀

According to “The Hobbit”, Gollum was once a handsome young man who was robbed of his youth, zest for life and energy by putting on a ring. Men, think about it!

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Am I the only person who hates spending the night at someone’s place? Like, we can hang out until 3 a.m., but I’m still going home.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

On a scale of quack to quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack quack, what do you think of my duck-based numbering system?

8 folks are currently checking 👀

There’s an unwritten rule: if you need something and it’s available at your mom’s house, it’s yours.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

My morning routine includes 20 minutes of staring at the ceiling thinking about how tired I am and debating if I really need to live today.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,559

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

Even though he murders a lot of people, you can tell Freddie Kruger is a fun loving guy cause he goes by Freddie and not Fred or Frederick.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has viewed:

There are too many movies about vampire hunters and not enough about vampire gatherers.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

If God had known what mankind would turn into, he would have sterilized Adam.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

If I found E.T., I would’ve developed his jump shot.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

Cats love to wake you up and go back to sleep. It’s part of their culture.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

The main problem is that far too many people have far too easy access to podcast equipment.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

My favorite part about summer is when I get to go back inside where it’s air conditioned.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

Since emojis have been around, I finally have a rough idea of how women feel when they don’t know what to wear.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

We live in a time where intelligent people are being silenced, so that stupid people won’t be offended.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has downloaded:

Viewing someone’s LinkedIn after they’ve viewed yours to assert dominance.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Americans can choose from over 1,000 breakfast cereals but only two presidential candidates?

Going viral on Instagram:

You look like the kind of person who would hit rock bottom and then start drilling.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

According to the smoke alarm, the food is ready.

Going bananas on Telegram:

I just want a bar where I can pour my own drink, have music at a normal volume, and there are no people, and it’s my house.

Going bananas on X:

There’s literally no law that says you can’t put your friends down as your references and pretend they were your boss at an old job. Literally, there’s no law that says that.

Spotted on Twitch:

We are both insane on the web, I think we can make it work.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

“I’m getting tired of everything being 100 dollars and 100 degrees.”

Just shared via TikTok:

It’s a good thing when your therapist sits down with a bucket of popcorn, right?

Just landed via WeChat:

I refuse to be bound by the social construct called “the calendar.” Merry Christmas, everyone.

Just shared via TikTok:

Dude so boring, it’s like his personality swiped left on him.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴