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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

My ducks are not even remotely in a row. My ducks are in places no duck has ever gone before.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

Apple want $3,500 for their Vision Pro. No thanks. I can look like a dork for free.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

Your Starbucks order leads me to believe that you’re very difficult to deal with.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

I haven’t given up on my fairy-tale ending. I still plan to be eaten by a wolf.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has shared:

Thought I was a minimalist, turns out I’m just broke.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

I just come here for the free life advice and inspirational quotes from people who’s lives are complete train wrecks.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

Talents: eating!

Someone from 🇰🇮 has downloaded:

If you are lonely, dim all lights and put on a horror movie. After a while it won’t feel like you are alone anymore.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has bookmarked:

I hate it when I gain 20 pounds for a role and then realize I’m not an actor.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

Maybe I died of Covid in 2020, and this is hell.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

215 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,484

Funny Quotes Topics

17,554

Funny Quotes Images

15,484

Jan 5, 2026

3,375

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Twitch:

I see people my age out there climbing mountains and skydiving, and here I am feeling good about myself because I got my leg through my underwear without losing my balance.

Going viral on X:

Not to brag, but I can put my socks on without sitting down.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

If liars’ pants really did catch on fire, watching the news would be a lot more fun.

Just shared via Telegram:

Life hack: you don’t need salt if you just cry into your dinner.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Might quit my job to focus on actually putting away my laundry.

Spotted on Facebook:

50 shades of single.

Making waves on Messenger:

I read classics because my FOMO is making me want to understand every reference ever.

Just landed via TikTok:

There’s an app for the people who say they’re not seeking some form of validation here. It’s called a diary.

Spotted on Threads:

The world is such a beautiful place when you don’t think too hard about it or look around.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

If we keep saving daylight, daylight will never learn to save itself.

Can you check if my lips taste like cherries?

2 months ago

0

Can you check if my lips taste like cherries?

Download image ↓

Commentary:
🍒 “Ah, the classic ‘subtle’ way to confirm if your lip balm is on point or if you’ve been enjoying too many cherry-flavored snacks! No need for a taste test, just ask a friend – or risk confusing the next person you chat with!” 😉👄

check, cherry, date, flirt, humor, lips, taste

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

More foods should have boats, why should gravy have all the fun?

0

2 months ago

boat, creativity, culinary, food, fun, gravy, humor, should
The iPhone alarm is so effective that you wake up before it goes off, so you don’t have to listen to such an unbearable noise.

0

5 months ago

alarm, annoying, annoying sound, before, effective, iPhone, listen, morning, noise, sleep, sound, wake, wake up
Can’t. Typing a password into a TV.

0

2 months ago

everyday, everyday life, frustration, humor, life, password, technology, TV, typing
I’m so old and have never even met a woman named Jolene. I’d really like to find her, though. She can have my man.

0

2 months ago

age, even, humor, ID, jealousy, Jolene, love, love triangle, man, met, never, old, relationship, triangle, woman
First rule for the new year is to not dwell on what went wrong this year.

0

2 months ago

dwell, new, new year, positivity, reflection, rule, self-improvement, wrong, year
Most people prefer lies. The truth just hits them like a WiFi outage, and then they just stand there, confused and buffering.

0

2 months ago

buffering, confused, confusion, humor, just, lie, most, outage, people, reality, stand, technology, truth, wifi

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

61 shares on WeChat this month:

Bring me a higher love. You have 24 hours. No cops.

31 shares on Messenger this month:

You’re in her DMs. I’m accidentally reposting reels of Tibetan foxes because I don’t know how to use the app anymore.

87 shares on Threads this month:

There are people who have a favourite colour, and there are people whose favourite colour is purple. These are very different things. Purple fans are different creatures.

71 shares on YouTube this month:

“NOT dishwasher safe!” You’ll be okay, buddy, just do your best in there.

38 shares on Slack this month:

Changed my bio on bumble to “I’m gonna murder ur whole family” and guys still responded.

20 shares on Twitch this month:

My big 3? Yapping, napping & snacking!

88 shares on WeChat this month:

Automatic doors that don’t open fast enough make me look dumb.

25 shares on Twitch this month:

You can be anything when you grow up. For instance, I am very tired.

49 shares on X this month:

Welcome to your 50s. You used to be a lot taller.

57 shares on WhatsApp this month:

This is my phone. I text back when I want to.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

So I just keep making dinner? Every night of my life? For forever?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I don’t trust anyone who gets enraged over messed-up fast food orders.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I can’t tell if I need coffee, a hug, or to just go live in the woods forever.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Got banned from the sauna at my gym for saying “steam me up, Scotty” a few too many times.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Adulthood will turn Gmail into part of your social media routine.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Yawning is the body’s way of telling you it has only 15% battery remaining.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

TV lead me to believe grave digging would be a lot easier.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

If you’re alone on Thanksgiving, venmo me $25 and I’ll call and ask you when are you gonna get a “real” job and give me grandchildren.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to Netflix. We have every movie but the one you actually want to watch.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

How you conduct yourself when using plastic wrap is the real you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

215 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,484

Funny Quotes Topics

17,554

Funny Quotes Images

15,484

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,425

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇿 has downloaded:

Adults chasing the popularity they missed out on as teenagers are the worst.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has bookmarked:

Friends with benefits, but it’s just that they make delicious baked goods.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

Put my height in bio. Hope it lands me a girlfriend.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

Delete a letter of his name from your contacts every time he makes you upset. When his name’s gone, he’s gone. Hangman that boy.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

4 out 3 people struggle with math.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has downloaded:

My life coach told me I didn’t make the team.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

He’s a 10 but so is his volume.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

Becoming an adult was the worst thing I’ve ever done.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

Ignored the small door that appeared in my apartment three days ago, and now it’s gone. That’s how it’s done.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has downloaded:

Dear algorithm, only show this post to the most attractive and successful people.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Reddit:

Called in, “I put the lime in the coconut and drank it all up.”

Breaking via Pinterest:

If I could have immunity to anything I would pick calories.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Relationships are actually easy when you’re not dating a lying weirdo.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

You’re all using your crystals wrong. Put them in a sock and start swinging.

Just shared via TikTok:

Date idea: you tell me every thought you’ve ever had about me.

Just landed via Discord:

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but there’s only 365 shopping days left until Christmas.

Live now on Pinterest:

Seize the day! Unless it sucks. Then seize the next one.

Just landed via Instagram:

I really cannot be friends with picky eaters because it somehow always correlates to bigger problems and character flaws.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Dating apps never work for me because I need at least two years of friendship charged with weird sexual tension to even consider falling in love.

Trending via Pinterest:

If a man says “I don’t deserve you,” believe him. Because he is about to show you why.

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Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴