Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

Took the road less travelled after buying the sat nav less expensive.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Millennials aren’t having kids because no one’s made lo-fi hip-hop beats to yell at your kids to.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

We’re living in increasingly unfergalicious times.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

A marriage is about solving problems together, you know, those problems you wouldn’t have if you were single.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

My fitness goal is to lose two straight jacket sizes.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has copied:

It’s getting slide guitar and harmonica hot outside.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

People in glass houses shouldn’t throw orgies.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

My mom asked me to hand out invitations for my brother’s surprise birthday party, and that’s when I realized he was the favorite twin.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has downloaded:

Apart from “It’s okay”, what other death threats do women use?

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

Men be like, yes, I hurt you, but now you hate me, so I am the true victim.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

220 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,489

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,489

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,305

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I’m at the age where using the wrong pillow makes you feel like you broke your neck.

Breaking via TikTok:

Adulthood is realising no one cares about you, and the show must go on.

Just landed via Snapchat:

They said don’t try this at home, so I’m coming over to your place.

Going bananas on YouTube:

Sorry I’m late. The door said PULL, but I don’t believe everything I read.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I believe in Bigfoot because Bigfoot believes in me.

Trending via Twitch:

A police lineup, but you have to recognize your dad’s sneeze.

Going viral on Twitch:

Being naked with shoes on feels more naked than being totally naked.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Sperm me would be swimming in the other direction.

Trending via Facebook:

I’m so tired of not being a multimillionaire.

Just shared via YouTube:

It’s awkward touching hands with another man inside a popcorn bag, especially if you don’t know the man and he doesn’t know you’re eating his popcorn.

Cats are probably like: Oh, I should follow you on Litterboxd.

0
Cats are probably like: Oh, I should follow you on Litterboxd.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Guess cats are just looking for some purr-worthy movie recommendations! 🐱🍿 Who knew they were so 'particular' about their film choices… 😹📽️"

, , , , , , , ,

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

73 shares on Messenger this month:

Since I stopped texting first, I haven’t heard from a lot of people in a while.

44 shares on X this month:

It’s so peaceful when you have no interest in other people’s business.

88 shares on YouTube this month:

Men will ruin your whole life and come back and like your Instagram story.

89 shares on Slack this month:

Nice thing about dating a doctor is if you wanna stop seeing them, you can just eat an apple.

49 shares on Slack this month:

I deleted Google when I met you because the search was over.

82 shares on X this month:

Babe, is everything OK? You’ve barely accomplished anything at all in your entire life.

20 shares on Instagram this month:

“Are you seeing anyone,” like hallucinating?

19 shares on LinkedIn this month:

You should be able to google why a couple broke up.

14 shares on Pinterest this month:

I want to be a garbage man, so I only have to work one day a week.

26 shares on TikTok this month:

Relationship Status: just tried to pet my dog and he turned his head so I pretended I was reaching for a leaf that was next to him.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

10 folks are currently checking 👀

If you have gray in your beard, you can hit it.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

It ain’t easy being America’s sweetheart during these dark times, but someone gotta do it!

9 folks are currently checking 👀

“How am I supposed to avoid Al when I’ve procrastinated on a paper?” With a night full of caffeine and nicotine like your forefathers, you babies.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I know there are bigger problems in the world right now, but I’ve just realized I’ve never seen a baby seagull.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Booked an escape room but just to get away from everyone. No plans of escaping.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

This meeting could have been a painting in a museum of boredom.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

“We told you to stop at 2012!” – The Mayans

10 folks are currently checking 👀

For your own sanity, always take mixed signals as a no.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Only at 27 do you become old, and then when you turn 30, you become younger than ever. That’s just how it goes.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

I feel like a large portion of my adult life has been looking for an adult to do my adulting.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

220 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,489

Funny Quotes Topics

17,559

Funny Quotes Images

15,489

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,444

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

I don’t have a yoga mat, but I have a Twister mat, and it’s the same thing.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

Your card declining when you know you have money is a very funny experience.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has shared:

Did it hurt when you forgot your headphones and couldn’t romanticize your walk home?

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

Getting older is so fun. Your life goals slowly transition from things like ‘land a dream job’ to ‘successfully grow a cherry tomato.’

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

Eight times a day, I ask myself which object in the office will hurt me enough so that I can go home, but at the same time won’t hurt too much.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

I respect perfume commercials being like we can’t show you a smell mind if we just go insane for 30 seconds.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

Tonight I wanted to stop drinking but then I remembered the owner of the pub has a family to feed.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

I accidentally relaxed too much, and now I don’t have enough anxiety to get stuff done.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has downloaded:

Before I had kids I was only vaguely aware that Saturday had a 7am.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

I’ve never met a cake I didn’t want to fork.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via TikTok:

Don’t understand why electricians aren’t called power rangers, but okay.

Just shared via WeChat:

“You tryna hang?” Yeah bro, myself!

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

50 shades of single.

Shared recently on Messenger:

“Do you like using Twitter?” Does Sisyphus like his boulder?

Broadcasted on Threads:

A toddler can do more in one unsupervised minute than most people can do all day.

Just shared via Threads:

If my house is clean, just know I yelled at everyone for two hours first.

Trending via Discord:

I am not old. I am in the prime of my decay.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Geometry is a scam. What do you mean “prove it’s a triangle”? Just look at it.

Making waves on WeChat:

“Devil’s advocate” implies the existence of heaven’s prosecutor.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Asking women for sex just to end the conversation.

© 2026. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴