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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇾 has shared:

If a company’s hiring sign says, “Come grow with us,” you’re about to do the job of 3-5 people.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

I lost my composure in 1992. I haven’t seen it since.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

My goal in life is to not have to commit seppuku.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

The free hotel blow-dryer should be easier to get off the bathroom wall.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

Potatoes make French fries, chips and vodka. It’s like the other vegetables aren’t even trying.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

I wonder if the sun also takes pictures of humanity going down?

Someone from 🇹🇬 has copied:

I love when women have one daughter as their only child. It’s so incredibly chic.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

What bootlickers fail to understand is that the boot eventually comes for them too.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

One thing I hate more than a liar is a liar that thinks I’m dumb.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

My playlist is so random, I be heartbroken, thugged out, and yeehaw all at the same time.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Jan 31, 2026

Users Online

3,720

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Thank you for contacting the abyss. Your scream is very important to us.

Spotted on WeChat:

The only time your man will surprise you is when you specifically tell him what you want.

Seen just now on Reddit:

A perfect metaphor for my life would be “Someone trying to stand up in a hammock.”

Trending via Snapchat:

I, unfortunately, was born without any interest in Avatar.

Shared recently on Telegram:

12 people have been to the moon and only 8 people have won Takeshi’s Castle. Really makes you think.

Breaking via Twitch:

Has anyone else noticed that it’s hard to do things when you don’t want to?

Making waves on YouTube:

How do you tell someone that you will probably end up marrying them, but in a casual way?

Just shared via Facebook:

I let my cat smell every wine I drink so she can get a job as a sommelier and help pay my rent.

Seen just now on WeChat:

A toddler in their “why” phase makes you realize how little you know.

Just shared via YouTube:

I’m not alone. I have ants.

49 Funny belief quotes

More funny belief quotes 👇

Good morning to everyone who still believes what they see with their own two eyes.

3 weeks ago

belief, everyone, eye, eyes, good, good morning, humor, morning, own, perception, reality, sarcasm, sight, still
What no one ever considers is that the kids are pretending to believe in Santa for the sake of the parents.

1 month ago

belief, believe, childhood, ever, family, holiday, humor, kid, kids, parent, parents, pretend, pretending, Santa
Before you laugh at kids who believe in Santa, remember there are grown men who believe that Cristiano Ronaldo is a better footballer than Lionel Messi.

1 month ago

before, belief, believe, better, cristiano, Cristiano Ronaldo, debate, football, footballer, grown, grown man, humor, kid, kids, laugh, lionel, Lionel Messi, man, men, messi, remember, ronaldo, Santa, sports, sports debate
December turns me into someone who believes a fat man with a beard can fix everything.

1 month ago

beard, belief, Christmas, claus, December, everything, fat, fat man, fix, holiday, man, me, Santa, Santa Claus, someone
I still haven’t heard one good argument why I should stop believing in Santa.

2 months ago

argument, belief, Christmas, good, holiday, humor, i, Santa, should, skepticism, still, stop, tradition, why
Some people believe the appendix is a vestigial organ, that its use has long since passed. I think it’s primordial. Its use has yet to come.

2 months ago

appendix, belief, believe, biology, humor, i, organ, people, primordial, think, vestigial, vestigial organ
Probably always gonna be the weirdo that believes in magic.

3 months ago

always, belief, fantasy, humor, individuality, magic, quirky, weirdo
You should just baseline mistrust every single politician at every level until they prove themselves worthy of liking.

3 months ago

belief, cynicism, every, humor, just, level, liking, mistrust, opinion, politician, politics, prove, satire, should, single, skepticism, trust
I do believe in aliens, but do they also believe in me?

3 months ago

aliens, belief, believe, curiosity, extraterrestrial, humor, i, imagination, me, sci-fi

For even more funny belief quotes, hit next 👇

All funny belief quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Social Media Stars ⭐

51 shares on Twitch this month:

Since I’ve stayed away from most people, I get on much better with people.

80 shares on Slack this month:

Nobody watches you harder than people who don’t like you, so give them a show they will never forget.

26 shares on Pinterest this month:

No we can’t hangout, you’ll end up falling in love with me and I don’t have time for that.

64 shares on Threads this month:

“I asked Grok.” “I asked ChatGPT.” Well, I asked R2D2, and he said you’re a loser.

89 shares on Pinterest this month:

Dr. Pepper just unseated Pepsi as the second most popular soda in America. Don’t tell me that getting your PhD isn’t worth it.

15 shares on Telegram this month:

Therapy? I have Spotify.

15 shares on Twitch this month:

Wonder if I should do something with my life, or kind of just continue to hang out.

35 shares on Twitch this month:

I love when people start getting filler, and instead of looking younger, it’s just like okay, your face is getting really, really big in all directions.

22 shares on X this month:

Shout out to people jogging in this heat, no, seriously, shout out to make sure they’re okay.

72 shares on WeChat this month:

I hate porn that starts off with sex. I need to know why they have sex.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

I can’t believe that it’s our turn to give money to our nephews and nieces.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

Sitting next to you on an empty train and clicking my stopwatch every time you turn a page in your book.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

What is rizz if not swag persevering?!

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

They charge you for the groceries and then they charge you for the toilet paper when you turn the groceries into poop. Open your eyes!

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

Offering someone food, and secretly hoping, they don’t want it.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

One of the worst ways to waste your youth is by being insecure.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

Having a girlfriend who doesn’t post herself on social media is an underrated blessing.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

I’m having a garage sale and hope people I’ve borrowed things from don’t come.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

I hate it when someone gives me a valid solution to my problem and I have to find something new to complain about.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has downloaded:

Getting old would be so fun if you didn’t wake up each morning with neck pain that suggests you slept hanging upside down like a bat.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on X:

Have an early flight tomorrow, so naturally I’m going to stay up late tonight and be weird in my room.

Broadcasted on Threads:

Forget tequila, I’m at the age where you can wake up with a hangover from Netflix.

Seen just now on Discord:

Brains are funny. I can remember every word to a song I haven’t heard in 20 years, but I’ve got no clue what my email password is.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Automated phone system: To speak to a representative, please enter the last twelve digits of Pi.

Going viral on Twitch:

Apple’s secret growth engine: vibe coders paying the $99 Apple Developer Program fee.

Breaking via Instagram:

Can I come over and crawl around on you like a bug?

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Harmonicas are basically for people who like to hear music while they spit.

Just shared via YouTube:

Do crabs underwater think that fishes fly?

Trending via Reddit:

Wishing I could hit snooze on life’s alarm clock!

Spotted on WhatsApp:

To get my cat to eat, I tell him about all the hungry cats in Catfrica.

Activity Log ✨

49 Funny belief quotes

More funny belief quotes 👇

All funny belief quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨