Commentary:
Who needs a knight in shining armor when you can have a TV remote and some peace? 🏰🍕📺
197 Funny better quotes
I don’t get treadmills, I mean if I walk I better reach somewhere.
Commentary:
"Who needs to chase pavements on a treadmill when you can chase dreams in real life? 🚶♂️💭 Keep on walking, and don't forget your destination is waiting for you outside the gym!"
Nobody plays better together than siblings being told it’s bedtime.
Commentary:
"Ah, the magical moment when siblings transform from rivals to allies in the epic battle against bedtime! 🤣🌙 Who knew sibling solidarity could be so strong when facing the dreaded lights out? #SiblingGoals"
I Knew Better, But I Did It Anyway: A Memoir
Commentary:
📖 "I Knew Better, But I Did It Anyway: A Memoir" sounds like the chronicles of every Monday morning decision ever made! We've all been there – hindsight is 20/20, but sometimes foresight is just a little blurry! Can't wait to read about the adventurous escapades and questionable choices that led to this captivating title! 😂✨
Lego better be trying to cure child cancer with how much their shit cost.
Commentary:
"Seriously, Lego should come with a money-back guarantee that buying them helps fund a cure for child cancer! 💸🤔 Maybe they're made of magic bricks that hold the secret to ending all diseases! ✨🤞 Or maybe they just know we'll pay anything for those satisfying 'click' sounds. 🧱💰#LegoForACause"
Nothing guarantees running into someone you know in public better than looking like a feral animal on two hours of sleep.
Commentary:
"Struggling to keep your eyes open and hair in place? Watch out – your new social strategy is here! 🙈💤 Just remember, looking like a feral animal isn't always a bad thing… it just means you're always ready for a 'wild' encounter! 🐾😂"
I’m not stubborn, my way is just better than yours.
Commentary:
"Who says I'm stubborn? I prefer to think of it as confidently committed to superior decision-making 🤷♂️💁♀️ #MyWayOrTheHighway"
I wish I could join, but I’m busy plotting revenge because my kids laughed when I showed them I can shake it better than Shakira.
Commentary:
"Watch out, Shakira! 😂 Looks like there's a new hip-shaker in town, determined to prove those kids wrong! 💃👀 Revenge is a dish best served with a side of sassy dance moves! 🕺😆"
If you want to impress me with your car, it better be a food truck.
Commentary:
"Who needs horsepower when you can have lunch power? 🚚🍔 Trade in your sports car for a food truck and win hearts with every meal! 🏎️❌🌮 #StreetEats"
Throwing a spear at your enemy is a bad gamble. If you miss, you have no spear now and he’s just fine. He’s better than fine; now he has a spear.
Commentary:
🎯🤦♂️ Don't put all your spears in one throw! Remember, sharing is caring, but sharing your spear with the enemy might not be the best strategy. It's like playing catch, but with pointy ends involved! Keep your spear close and your aim closer! 🔥🤣