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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Men have nice skin because they stress out everyone but themselves.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

Marriage is for life. But when that was first said, life was shorter.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

80 years ago we would have all been institutionalized and I think that’s beautiful.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

It’s Mother’s Day Eve so remember to leave out a bottle of wine for Mom when she comes down the chimney.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

Does your life really flash before your eyes or is it just your brain closing all open tabs one last time.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

Sweet, but twisted. Does that make me a candy cane?

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

I would like to thank my arms for always being by my side. My legs for always supporting me. And my fingers because I can always count on them.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

iPad PR is so crazy because you think you absolutely need one until you get it.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has bookmarked:

Old enough to know better. Young enough to do it anyway.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

The gap in my resume? Yeah, it’s called playing outside.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

237 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,506

Funny Quotes Topics

17,571

Funny Quotes Images

15,506

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,610

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Snapchat:

“Do you like the Microsoft Teams app?” Does Sisyphus like his boulder?

Shared recently on Pinterest:

The best thing about dogs is you can act like something really good just happened, and they’ll instantly start celebrating too. They have no idea what the context is; they’re just always ready to party, no matter what.

Going viral on Telegram:

Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

The only problem I have with chocolate is that one minute it’s there and the next it’s not.

Just shared via Slack:

Choosing to ignore my strangely symbolic dream because I have a lot going on right now already.

Going viral on X:

Being in college when The Chainsmokers dropped Closer was an experience to say the least.

Going viral on Discord:

Super excited for a brand new week of hoping for the best, but expecting the worst.

Going bananas on Facebook:

The thing I hate most about my stationary bike is having to pick it up and turn it around for the return trip.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

“Don’t bite the hand that feeds you!” Maybe just don’t bite hands. Shouldn’t have to qualify it.

Just shared via Slack:

January feels like a schizophrenic episode.

Funny handed quotes

Funny handed quotes bring a hilarious twist to the quirks of lefties and righties alike 🖐️😂 Whether you’re left-handed, right-handed, or just love a clever pun, these witty lines will have you laughing out loud 🤣✨ Perfect for sharing with friends or brightening your day with a pinch of humor! Ready to celebrate those unique hand vibes? Let’s dive in and get those funny bones tickled! 🎉👋

New funny handed quotes 👇

All funny handed quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

34 shares on Telegram this month:

Іf Empire Strikes Back isn’t a Christmas movie, then why is there so much snow in it?

96 shares on Facebook this month:

If I was a star and you were a star, I would wink at you and blink at you and twinkle at you and the earthlings would call it science.

12 shares on Slack this month:

My wife called to tell me she saw a fox on the way to work. I asked her how she knew it was on its way to work. She hung up on me.

48 shares on Messenger this month:

“Baby on board” Okay, well, can you tell him to drive faster?

84 shares on Discord this month:

“Stalking”. God forbid I have access to public information and know how to utilize my resources.

37 shares on Instagram this month:

When women get to a certain weight, you’ll notice they change their social media profile pictures to flowers, cats, or dogs.

34 shares on Pinterest this month:

I would like to thank my middle finger for always sticking up for me when I needed it.

88 shares on Snapchat this month:

My only chance at a big house in the country is if I become a rescue dog.

99 shares on X this month:

You can just comment, “You two look nice,” on a photo of three people. It’s free and legal.

17 shares on Instagram this month:

Do you know how much trauma it took to be this funny?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

You can always gauge my mood by the type of animal videos I share: sweet puppy videos or a cat smacking the shit out of someone.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

A lot of y’all don’t understand politics because your history teacher was the football coach.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

What substance do I have to abuse to stop yearning?

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Naps are tricky. Either you wake up relaxed and refreshed, or you have a headache, a dry throat and no idea what year it is.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not being smart, I’m just a skilled trained professional in pointing out the obvious.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Every day, I’m gaslit into oblivion by beautiful women, and then I go to sleep.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Showing up late with an iced coffee is not about poor time management, it’s about knowing how to make an entrance.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t forget to brush your teeth, comb your hair, cleanse your face, and share my posts.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

I like my bacon like I like my men, slightly burnt and crispy, and probably killing me slowly.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

237 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,506

Funny Quotes Topics

17,571

Funny Quotes Images

15,506

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,669

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

Revenge? No. I just post hot selfies and let the algorithm do God’s work.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

Some people have goals based on a summer body. Mine revolve entirely around the weight limit of my beach chairs.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has downloaded:

So deep in her Instagram story, I accidentally liked an ad for a Toyota.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has shared:

The sandwich I made for lunch didn’t even make it until 10am.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

Perhaps moths don’t seek the light, but are simply fleeing the darkness.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

We need an app where introverts can pay extroverts to make phone calls for them.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

Blocking me is like blocking the sun, the moon and the stars.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has shared:

Do y’all ever think about how, in Korean, you can’t scream over text because there’s no uppercase… I think about that all the time, for some reason.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has viewed:

I forgot to get milk, so Santa has a cup of Pepsi Max.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

When I gain weight, I should get to designate where on my body it goes.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Twitch:

When I get tired of shopping, I sit down and try on shoes.

Going viral on Slack:

Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened.

Making waves on Telegram:

The only way to my heart is with a knife.

Trending via YouTube:

I think that McDonalds is putting an unhealthy amount of lettuce in the Big Macs these days.

Seen just now on Facebook:

The way people who are really into each other look moments before kissing is so hot. It’s like seeing a glimpse of cannibalism.

Trending via Twitch:

You want me to pay attention to the details? The thing the devil is in?

Just landed via Discord:

I feel like you’re allowed to start your day at 4 p.m. if you are pure of heart.

Just shared via TikTok:

You can always tell when someone is on a diet by how they scrape every last bit from that yogurt container.

Making waves on Slack:

They say sugar can’t fix your problems. Yeah, well, neither can broccoli. At least cake puts in the effort.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

If I learned anything in college, it’s that pepper spray only stings for a couple hours.

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