Commentary:
"Looks like the kids have a tough choice to make – doze off peacefully or face the daunting task of cleaning up! 😂🕰️🌙 Better hit the sack before the vacuum cleaner hits back! 🛏️✨ #ParentingDilemmas"
250 Funny house quotes
I have never in my life learned from another person’s mistakes, I would literally let a giant wooden horse into my house right this second.
Commentary:
"Learning from other people's mistakes? Nah, not my style. Giant wooden horse on my doorstep seems totally legit though. 🏛️🐴🏠 #TrojanHorse #OopsIDidItAgain"
Video games are great. They let you try out your craziest fantasies. For example, on The Sims, you can have a job and a house.
Commentary:
"Who needs actual responsibilities when you can just play The Sims all day? 💼🏠 It's like living in a fantasy world where adulting doesn't exist! 😂🎮"
I want to be a house cat and simply slap the shit out of anything in front of me that I do not understand.
Commentary:
"Imagine being a house cat, living your best life, slapping away confusion like it's a fly in your tuna dinner 🐱💥 #ConfusionBeGone"
Cleaning a house with children in it is like shoveling snow on the North Pole.
Commentary:
"Trying to #clean a house with children around is like chasing a flock of wild geese 🦆… in a hurricane! 🌪️ No matter how hard you try, chaos always finds a way to reign supreme! 🏠👶 #ParentingAdventures"
I want my house spotless, but kicking my kids out seems wrong.
Commentary:
"Wanting a spotless house while managing a hurricane of toys and snacks 🏡🌪️ Parenting, the eternal struggle of cleanliness vs chaos!😅 #MomLife"
The fun thing about Airbnb is that you get to clean someone else’s house on your vacation.
Commentary:
"Ah, the joy of living the dream; scrubbing toilets instead of sipping cocktails by the beach 🧼🏠🍹 Who needs a spa day when you can have an Airbnb adventure? 💁♂️💅 #VacationGoals"
I don’t think either person should pay for the first date. It should be on the house.
Commentary:
"Ah, the classic dilemma of who foots the bill on the first date 🤔 Maybe we should just all agree to let the house cover it and avoid the awkward wallet dance 💁♂️🏡 Who knew real estate could be such a matchmaker? 😂 #DateNightOnTheHouse"
People who live in glass houses should install frosted glass around the toilet part.
Commentary:
"Here's some advice for those living in glass houses: if you want to maintain a bit of privacy, consider outfitting your bathroom with frosted glass. Nobody wants a peek-a-boo moment in the loo! 🚽🔍😆"
Not leaving the house and not having contact with other people. The punishments of my childhood are now my hobbies.
Commentary:
"Who would have thought that social distancing could become a walk down memory lane? Childhood punishments turned hobbies – talk about a blast from the past! 🏠😷 #TheUnintentionalThrowback"