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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has bookmarked:

Schrodinger’s Immigrant: A person who is simultaneously too lazy to work, but is also stealing your job.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has viewed:

Stop blaming everyone for your problems. Pick one person you really hate and blame them for everything.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

You can just make up words and if you say them in a Scottish accent, people will think they’re real: Looka the wee janglers on that tary bibbit.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

It’s crazy that things have got to a point where you can say, “Jurassic Park 3 is one of the better movies in the series.”

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

Thinking of becoming the “where’s my hug” guy in prison.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

Please don’t tell me how bad your life was growing up; we had to manually roll up our cars’ windows.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

Sorry, I don’t think I can hang out this weekend, my 4-year-old is still telling a joke.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Just found out about confirmation bias, and now every article I read totally proves I was right to be worried about it.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

The feminine urge to act clueless while knowing everything.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2248 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,410

Funny Quotes Topics

15,117

Funny Quotes Images

12,410

Updated

16 minutes ago

Users Online

3,431

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Reddit:

In hell, you wait for a ‘verify your email address’ email that never arrives.

Going viral on X:

If you don’t have a favorite spatula yet, you still have some growing up to do.

Just shared via Reddit:

November is for turtlenecks and depression.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

No one is more surprised than my kids every night when I say it’s bed time.

Spotted on Telegram:

Somebody needs to get my shit together.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

If someone asks you if you’re in the queue, what they actually mean is “you’re really shit at queuing, aren’t you?”

Just landed via Twitch:

Nobody flirts better than a girl with zero interest.

Making waves on WeChat:

I hate when someone you love says mean things like, “It’s time to wake up.”

Trending via Instagram:

Saw the eye doctor, and that’s 90% of the vision test right there.

Broadcasted on Discord:

A lobotomy and a forehead kiss would fix everything.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2248 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,410

Funny Quotes Topics

15,117

Funny Quotes Images

12,410

Updated

16 minutes ago

Users Online

3,428

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

Relationship status: you’d think something called a Roomba would be a better dancer.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

Only mosquitoes find me attractive. Nobody else.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

I’m never wrong. Just different levels of right.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has shared:

Bold of you to assume I have the energy to even climb a hill to die on.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has downloaded:

“Thug life,” I whisper to myself as I check out my sunglasses in the mirror.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

I always knew I’d get old. How fast it happened was a bit of a surprise though.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

Grammar is important. It’s the difference between feeling your nuts and feeling you’re nuts.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

Croutons feel like an apology. “Sorry we gave you salad. Have some consolation toast.”

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

Call me dramatic, but I think I deserve a love confession in the rain.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

There should be a special rating system for movies that tells you how uncomfortable you’ll be if you watch them with your parents.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Reddit:

I heard God is testing both of us at the same time. Wanna hang out?

Breaking via Slack:

Me: This is my favorite. I would like to buy this exact same item of clothing again. The fashion industry: No.

Reported on X:

Every room can be a room with a view when I’m in it.

Just landed via Pinterest:

I hurt my bottom after shaking it at the office party. It was a twerk-place injury.

Just shared via Facebook:

If a tree falls in a forest and doesn’t make a sound, maybe that’s where your kid should be practicing the piano.

Seen just now on Threads:

Find someone who looks at you the way I look at a cheeseburger.

Going viral on Instagram:

Not to brag but I gave someone directions and he made it.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Sorry I can’t have a pleasant, safe and affordable life, my government said no.

Freshly posted on X:

I yelled at my cat and the other cats yelled at me. Like wow, okay, pay my mortgage then.

Trending via Messenger:

Buying groceries with no food stamps should boost your credit score.

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