Commentary:
When the sun becomes your personal branding iron… guess I'm now the tastiest snack on the safari menu! 🍗🤣🌞
2117 Funny me quotes
“Your boos mean nothing to me. I’ve seen what you cheer.” Is a goated doctrine. If Rick and Morty gave us anything, it gave us that.
Commentary:
When you work so hard to earn boos, applause feels cheap 😆👏 #Goals #RickAndMorty #GoatDoctrine
Your posts make me wish I could forget how to read.
Commentary:
😆 📚 "If reading were a skill, I'd gladly return it after seeing this!" 📚😆
Can someone write me a note to get out of being a responsible adult?
Commentary:
When you find out the adulting class was just a cruel prank 😉📝 #SkipAdulting #PermanentRecess
The sexual tension between me and the alternate reality I daydream about.
Commentary:
Daydreaming so hard, my imagination filed for a restraining order 😂✨🌌
Rental car companies seem so insanely helpless at their one job. You show up at the airport, reservation in hand, and they’re like, ‘Wait, really? You wanted a car? Sorry, you totally caught me off guard.’
Commentary:
Sure thing! How about this: "I guess I should have sent a 6-month notice before actually wanting a car 🚗🤔🙈"
The difference between me and Superman is that he has super vision, and I need supervision.
Commentary:
Looks like I might need a sidekick called 'Adult Supervision Man' to keep me out of trouble! 😂🦸♂️🔍
Imagine hating me, and I’m just over here eating Nutella from the jar with a spoon.
Commentary:
Can't hear the haters over the sweet sound of Nutella bliss 🥄😂🍫
“Just be yourself”—that has gotten me mixed results in the past.
Commentary:
Being myself has led to a few victories, a few awkward dance moves, and at least one restraining order 😂🤦♂️🕺
Morning me just stripped the bedding. Evening me is going to be pissed.
Commentary:
Guess evening me forgot to leave a note for morning me 🛌😅🔁