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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

Be warned: I’m bored. This could get dangerous.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

I don’t mind driving in bad weather. I mind other people driving in bad weather.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

No thank you, I only like men who have no interest in me.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

On the internet it’s super easy to take credit for stuff you had nothing to do with. That’s why I invented it.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

“You’re a cardiologist? Is that like a fancy name for an auto mechanic?”

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

I’m broke — I got money, but it’s for responsibilities.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

Hey girl, are you a cigarette? Because I like cigarettes.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

I’m tired of being an adult. Therefore, I will be stepping down. Thank you!

Someone from 🇦🇫 has bookmarked:

I read somewhere on the internet that 87% of what you read on the internet isn’t true, and I believe it.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

Good morning. May your day be as beautiful as I am.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

235 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,504

Funny Quotes Topics

17,569

Funny Quotes Images

15,504

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,531

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Messenger:

Girls don’t actually shop. We just walk round touching the clothes saying ‘this is cute’.

Just shared via Messenger:

There are three certainties in life: death, taxes and getting stuck behind a shit driver when you’re late.

Spotted on X:

Sorry I’m late. I was scraping the clearance tag off your Christmas present.

Making waves on Slack:

I never make the same mistake twice. I make it like five or six times. You know, just to be sure.

Just shared via Pinterest:

Maybe this is the Windows software update that changes everything for me.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Startup idea: Instagram, but it only shows you posts from people you follow, and they’re in chronological order.

Shared recently on X:

Inflation is actually a good thing, it means money is going viral.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Not to brag, but I finished an entire book in one sitting. I’m going to need some new crayons.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I remember when asking someone if they were on X meant something completely different.

Making waves on X:

Clearly, hell is empty, the demons are all here.

Funny misfortune quotes

Funny misfortune quotes bring a smile 😄 to those pesky moments when life doesn’t go our way 🍀➡️🌀. They turn mishaps into laughs 😂 and remind us that even bad luck can have a silver lining 🌈. Ready to giggle at some ironic twists of fate? Let’s dive into the lighter side of life’s little disasters! 🎢✨

New funny misfortune quotes 👇

All funny misfortune quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

73 shares on X this month:

Age range on my dating app set to 40+. Y’all fighting over grapes while I’m drinking wine.

13 shares on Discord this month:

Need someone to feed me Doritos while I read, so I don’t mess up the pages. No weirdos.

56 shares on Slack this month:

You know you don’t have to give your bathroom a beach theme, there’s no law.

35 shares on Discord this month:

Quitting my job to focus on decorating the tree.

81 shares on YouTube this month:

Apparently I lack empathy, according to some stupid cow in HR.

63 shares on Instagram this month:

With all the fake information out there, I refuse to believe scales or mirrors.

67 shares on Twitch this month:

Growing up, there was a Cody in every elementary school class, but as an adult, I haven’t met a Cody in years. Where did they go?

35 shares on Discord this month:

When women get to a certain weight, you’ll notice they change their social media profile pictures to flowers, cats, or dogs.

86 shares on WeChat this month:

Don’t worry. You’re exactly where you should be in life. Because you’ve made horrible choices.

20 shares on Instagram this month:

Where do you see yourself five beers from now? What’s your five-beer plan?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Ever woken up, kissed the person sleeping next to you and felt glad to be alive? I just did, so I won’t be catching this train again.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

You ever get surprised by your own recurring issues? Like, come on man, I thought we were past this.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I put my pants on like everyone else. With hope they still fit.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

“My reading glasses would look good on your nightstand.” -Me, flirting.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

“Never let someone else destroy your stuff when you can destroy it yourself”, every kid I ever.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Whoever named the meatball absolutely nailed it.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

“Nah.” – everyone with an office job, from the Monday after Thanksgiving until January 2nd.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

When the Olympics finally introduces the event “Dropping your phone and very nearly catching it but not quite” then you’ll all see me shine.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m never early… unless we’re talking about the airport.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

The gothic urge to live in a sleepy seaside town with a terrifying backstory.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

235 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,504

Funny Quotes Topics

17,569

Funny Quotes Images

15,504

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,254

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

Cats spend two-thirds of their lives sleeping, and the other third making viral videos.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

I’m so toxic, I can fight for a relationship I don’t even want.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

Do you know how much effort goes into looking this regular?

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

If a man says he’ll fix it, he will fix it. There’s no need to remind him every six months.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has copied:

If biscuits were slimming and contained every nutrient the human body needs, I’d be in terrific shape.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

Girlfriend is temporary, ex-girlfriend is forever.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

Doomscrolling: because who doesn’t love anxiety as a hobby?

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

Raisins also have wrinkles and are still sweet.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has copied:

Hot wings have killed many people starting with a dude named Icarus.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

Adulting in 3 words: it’s always something.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Once this pandemic ends, I’m legit quitting video games and getting a girlfriend for real.

Seen just now on X:

If you turn your phone upside down, the stock market is actually doing quite well.

Spotted on X:

So much anger in this small little body. I feel like a chihuahua.

Trending via Discord:

Sorry I left you on read, I didn’t mean to open it just yet.

Going viral on Snapchat:

That awkward moment when you gently throw your phone onto your bed and it decides to bounce off 3 walls, knock over a lamp, and land on the floor.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Dating is so overrated. Let’s just get married.

Trending via Instagram:

Kinda in the mood to let my feelings impair my judgement.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Womansplaining is when a woman tries to explain to you what you’re thinking/feeling, and is just totally 100% wrong.

Making waves on YouTube:

If a company’s hiring sign says, “Come grow with us,” you’re about to do the job of 3-5 people.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

You can’t fix stupid, but you can watch it in action on Facebook every day.

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