Commentary:
Oh, the classic "WWBD" dilemma strikes again! 🦇💭 Maybe it's time to switch to a more risk-averse role model like Cinderella or perhaps SpongeBob SquarePants? 🧽 Just a thought… 😉 #NewInspirationNeeded
166 Funny new quotes
Trending Funny New Quotes 🔥
- Humans should grow a new set of teeth in our 30s to make-up for all the poor decisions in our 20s.
- According to a new study, people who often trail off in the middle of a sentence are 30% more likely to
- I’m ready for a new relationship. My past is buried in the backyard, to fertilize the tomatoes.
- The worst part about borrowing money is having to pay it back or move to a new city.
- My husband said we need to start exercising and get into shape, so I’m going to wake up early tomorrow and start looking for a new husband.
More funny new quotes 👇
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"Looks like someone's ready to trade Grandma's knitting needles for some heavy-duty gear! 🚗💥 Watch out world, we've got a crochet daredevil on the loose! 🧶😄 #NeedleAndThreadSpeedster" -
Commentary:
Well, they do say that finding a new husband can be quite the workout! 💪😂 Who needs the gym when you can just go husband-hunting instead? 🏃♀️🔍 #NewHusbandNewMe -
Commentary:
"Oh, the classic math dilemma – solving one problem only to be ambushed by three more! 🤯 It's like a never-ending game of mathematical whack-a-mole! 🤓 Keep bringing on those problems, math whiz! 💪🔢 #MathMagic" -
Commentary:
According to a new study, people who often trail off in the middle of a sentence are 30% more likely to… well, let's just say their thoughts take an unexpected detour! 🚶♂️🤷♀️ #LostInThoughts -
Commentary:
"If life gives you lemons, I'll create a lemonade stand that sells theoretical physics lessons 🍋📚 Who needs solutions when you can have mind-bending puzzles? Let's make chaos fashionable again! 🔥💥 #ProblemSolverExtraordinaire" -
Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old question: should you reveal your inner genius or just embrace your idiocy right from the start? 🤔 Maybe it's best to sprinkle a little bit of both and let the surprise unfold naturally! After all, life is way more amusing when you can laugh at yourself! 🤪 #EmbraceTheIdiotWithin" -
Commentary:
Oh, the modern struggle of juggling passwords and identity theft risk! 🤦♂️ Who knew that a strong password could also double as free identity theft protection and a gentle reminder to sit up straight? 🤣 Stay safe out there, folks! #PasswordProblems #IdentityTheftDeterrent -
Commentary:
"Who knew shoes could be vegan too! 🤔🌱 Guess these kicks won't be asking for a snack anytime soon… Unless they develop a taste for tofu! 😂👟 #PlantPoweredFashion" -
Commentary:
"Looks like CVS is taking their 'receipt paper trail' to a whole new level! 🎉💸 Who knew those long receipts could bring joy and messiness at the same time? 😂 #CVSConfetti"
Top Funny New Quotes 🔥
- There is a giant spider on my dash so I’m going to have to buy a new car now.
- A new year resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.
- Starting a new show sucks. Who are these people?
- I’m always looking for new and exciting ways to give up.
- Christmas adverts: “Eat all the food! Drink all the drink! Spoil yourself! It’s Christmas!” New year adverts: “Look at what you’ve done to yourself, you fat sack of shit!”
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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need parenting people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology think time want work
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