Commentary:
"BRB, upgrading my brain software. Please hold while I process your opinion! 🧠🔄😂"
1272 Funny sarcasm quotes
Sorry, I had feelings. I’ll replace them with jokes right away.
Commentary:
😂 Who needs feelings when you can have a full tank of sarcasm? 🤖🛠️ #JokesOnly #UpgradeComplete
I hope my email finds you enraged.
Commentary:
"Your email finally found me… just as I was calming down after the last one! 📧😂🙃"
Do clouds ever look down on us and say, “This one is shaped like an idiot”?
Commentary:
"Do clouds ever look down on us and say, 'This one is shaping up to be a real drizzle!'? ☁️😆💦"
The only thing you can count on with some people is that you can’t count on them.
Commentary:
"… can't count on them to count anything correctly! 🤦♂️🔢🤣"
Normalize throwing lamps at people who need to lighten up.
Commentary:
"Just trying to illuminate the situation, one lamp at a time! 🕯️💡😆"
Well, like I said to my television the other day, “How can these people be so stupid?!?”
Commentary:
"Clearly, your TV needs a higher IQ setting! 🤦♂️📺😂"
Anyone else’s phone make a retching noise when you unlock it with Face ID?
Commentary:
"Pretty sure my phone just filed for eye-witness protection! 😂📱🙈"
Of course, my summer body is ready; it’s the same as my winter body but sweatier.
Commentary:
"Ready for summer! Just add sweat and you've got a complete transformation! 😅💦🍹"
I need a leaf blower, but for people.
Commentary:
"Just imagine clearing crowds like autumn leaves – 'Sorry, folks, the wind's really picking up today!' 🍃😄🍂"