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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡© has viewed:

I’m surviving motherhood, one teenage meltdown at a time.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡Ή has bookmarked:

Sorry about all of the correct stuff I said when I was right.

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡¨ has downloaded:

I can now tell the hour of the day by which part of my body needs a heating pad.

Someone from πŸ‡­πŸ‡Ί has downloaded:

Being single allows you to do a lot of things. For example, standing naked in the kitchen at night and eating cold pizza.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡± has bookmarked:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to skirt the issue.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡΄ has downloaded:

I am convinced that at least half of you are bots.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡» has downloaded:

No revenge, but I hope you stutter every time you try to dirty talk with someone.

Someone from πŸ‡­πŸ‡³ has downloaded:

Festival is when you pay a fortune to live like a homeless person.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Ύ has shared:

My brain has too many tabs open.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡Ύ has copied:

Don’t ever get excited if your kid likes a new food. They won’t like it tomorrow.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,243

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Going viral on Facebook:

β€œI’ll worry about it next time.” Me pissing off future me.

Trending via LinkedIn:

Some people can eat anything they want and stay slim. I put on weight just by reading the recipe.

Just landed via WeChat:

If I had today’s mind, I wouldn’t have made yesterday’s mistake. But if I hadn’t made yesterday’s mistake, I wouldn’t have today’s mind.

Making waves on TikTok:

Please don’t flirt with me. I’m trying not to cheat on my crush who doesn’t like me.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Of course I have critical thinking skills, I’m thinking critically of you right now.

Spotted on Instagram:

It’s like my therapist always says, that’ll be $175.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Dollar Tree needs to just go ahead and rename it to A Couple Dollars.

Going viral on Messenger:

I’m so glad when summer is over and I finally don’t have to see any feet on the internet anymore.

Spotted on Threads:

Why is it cute when a baby falls asleep clutching a bottle. Yet, when I do it, it’s “concerning”?

Trending via Slack:

My lips could use some attention today.

Funny suspense quotes

Funny suspense quotes keep you on the edge of your seat while tickling your funny bone πŸ˜‚πŸŽ­! They blend mystery and humor, making every twist and turn a delightful surprise πŸ€«πŸŽ‰. Perfect for breaking the tension or spicing up a dull moment, these witty lines turn suspense into a laugh-out-loud adventure πŸš€πŸ˜†. Ready to giggle through the suspense? Let’s dive in! πŸ”πŸŽ¬

New funny suspense quotes πŸ‘‡

All funny suspense quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes πŸ‘Œ

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! πŸ˜‰βœŒοΈ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. πŸ˜‚πŸ’₯

πŸŽ‰πŸ₯‚ New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

26 shares on Reddit this month:

My dental hygienist is probably thinking, I bet i could braid this guys nose hair.

84 shares on WeChat this month:

You’re my least favourite notification.

61 shares on Pinterest this month:

Eating watermelon and minding my own business.

94 shares on X this month:

Bisexual just means that I wear perfume with my men’s deodorant.

84 shares on Twitch this month:

If you’re thinking what I’m thinking, you need professional help.

72 shares on Discord this month:

One day you burned a CD for the last time and didn’t even realize it.

84 shares on YouTube this month:

Some people spend a fortune so they can circle the world. I drink some beer and the world circles around me.

14 shares on Telegram this month:

How long does it take for an apple to turn brown after you cut it? Never mind.

29 shares on Pinterest this month:

Introverts have fun, too β€” we just don’t care if you know.

54 shares on Slack this month:

You are allowed to be crazy as long as you are equally as hot.

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes πŸ’₯

25 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Aren’t you a little old to be a bully?

21 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

My toxic trait is thinking I deserve a vacation… while still on vacation.

25 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I’d log off, but I get so tired of hearing myself talk.

14 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Roses are red. I’m going to bed.

9 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

So, if you are too tired to speak, sit next to me, because I am fluent in silence.

14 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Did you know that if you listen to any Black Sabbath album backwards, you can hear them singing backwards?

16 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Before the internet, going viral meant your drawing made it to the fridge, and your sibling was furious.

21 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I can’t believe the gall of this bladder.

17 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Your posts make me wish I could forget how to read.

7 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Oh, him? He’s my insignificant other.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,686

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡­ has downloaded:

An email so annoying, you wanna return the computer to the store.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡» has downloaded:

Nothing makes you regret an outfit choice faster than when you see teens looking at you and whispering.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡³ has viewed:

Youngest siblings are literally weaponized incompetence, final boss.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡Ό has copied:

I’m waiting for the perfect moment to stop procrastinating.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡² has downloaded:

A dinosaur as a pet would solve so many problems. Mainly, people problems.

Someone from πŸ‡¦πŸ‡± has bookmarked:

I am stoned and laying in bed reading, and the idea of Santa going on Ozempic popped into my head, and I whispered, “No!”

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡΄ has copied:

Every Microsoft Teams invite you get lowers your testosterone by 1-2%

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡¨ has viewed:

I ate my exam paper. Which means that pretty soon I’ll pass the test.

Someone from πŸ‡·πŸ‡Ί has shared:

Welcome to your 40s: it’s Saturday night so you know what that means, absolutely nothing, go to bed.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡Ό has bookmarked:

Not now, babe, it’s my nightly phone enrichment time.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Having a pool is so neat. All of your friends are suddenly interested to catch up on the hottest days of the year.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I don’t need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry!

Shared recently on Telegram:

People who play golf don’t concern me nearly as much as the people who watch it.

Spotted on Messenger:

The only recipes they have online are where I’m the one who’s supposed to buy all this stuff and then make it. That’s not what I’m looking for.

Breaking via Facebook:

I birthed my kid faster than she can put on shoes.

Spotted on Reddit:

Elsa froze her entire kingdom instead of dealing with her feelings. I respect that level of avoidance.

Just landed via Reddit:

If I could have dinner with anyone, living or dead, I’d pick living.

Shared recently on Slack:

It’s funny how sometimes you buy a book, then read it in two days, and sometimes you buy a book, and it lives on your bookshelf for 12 years.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Someday I’ll learn how to emotion like a proper human.

Just shared via Telegram:

Vegans will look you dead in the eye and tell you cauliflower tastes like ribs.

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