Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

You know when you tap a video to see how long it’s got left? I wish you could do that to people while they’re talking.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

As a girl, I should be allowed to speak to the moon directly.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

Welcome to Twitter: yeah, none of us can sleep either.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

Sometimes I wish I could turn down the volume on certain people.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

I’d enjoy summer a lot more if someone came by hourly and misted me like produce.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has bookmarked:

If you can’t handle me at my weirdest, then leave, because it gets weirder.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

When you have intense chemistry with someone, everyone else feels so bleh.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

“You’re like if 9 a.m. on a Monday was a person.”

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

McDonald’s is finally promoting good health by making their food unaffordable.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

Nobody ever talks about how Sodom and Gomorrah were walkable cities.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,684

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Twitch:

Let’s all be grateful for a moment that stupidity is not contagious.

Shared recently on Discord:

There’s no way you could go all the way through the desert on a horse with no name, you’d have named it by the end.

Going viral on Telegram:

I’m not just a pretty face, I’m also a massive disappointment to my family.

Going bananas on Facebook:

For my next trick, I’ll need a divorce lawyer.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I can’t take people who pronounce “gnocchi” correctly seriously.

Spotted on YouTube:

I love eating fast food and getting big and fat. It’s amazing.

Going viral on Threads:

Lying to stupid people can give you a profound sense of satisfaction, it can also make you president.

Freshly posted on Threads:

If you wear enough cardigans, people will assume you’re smart and you can stop reading entirely.

Making waves on WeChat:

Unemployed folks always have esoteric knowledge, for some reason.

Going bananas on Telegram:

Why put off until tomorrow what you can have an intern do today?

In honor of Charles Dickens, I will also be poor this Christmas.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Channeling my inner Dickens this Christmas – Bah humbug to wealth, hello to the joy of being broke! 🎩💸 #LivingTheVictorianLife"

celebration, charles, Christmas, Dickens, holiday, honor, humor, i, irony, literary, literary reference, poor, reference

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’m gonna be the first zoomer to start dropping the ‘two thousand’ when referring to the past. “Yeah, that was back in ‘17.”

0

2 months ago

back, date, difference, dropping, evolution, generational, generational difference, humor, language, language evolution, nostalgia, past, reference, slang, start, year, year reference, Zoomer
If a demon ever possessed me, I’d just sit back and say, “Your problem now.”

0

5 months ago

attitude, back, demon, ever, humor, ID, just, me, possessed, possession, problem, sarcasm, say, sit, wit
I wish more dumb people were shy.

0

2 months ago

dumb, i, people, shy, wish
I am not someone you have to entertain if you invite me, because I will have canceled.

0

2 months ago

am, cancel, entertain, humor, i, invite, me, social, someone
In a parallel universe, there’s a happy me.

0

2 months ago

alternate, alternate reality, happiness, happy, humor, imagination, me, parallel, parallel universe, reality, self, universe
I can still drop it like it’s hot. It’s just a lot harder to pick it back up.

0

2 months ago

ability, aging, back, difficulty, drop, drop it, harder, hot, humor, i, just, lot, physical, physical ability, pick, still

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

65 shares on Reddit this month:

Text a co-worker at a random time “are you joining this meeting?” as a fun holiday prank.

24 shares on Instagram this month:

Denying the existence of anyone that annoys me.

56 shares on YouTube this month:

Anyone who doesn’t like me snoring, doesn’t deserve me moaning either.

26 shares on Twitch this month:

They should make a tanning bed that constantly rolls you over like a gas station hotdog.

70 shares on WeChat this month:

I’m putting free wifi on my gravestone, so people will come visit me.

82 shares on Facebook this month:

I love my cat, but I hope in her next life she’s reincarnated as the owner of a very whiny cat.

25 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m like Pooh Bear. I just want to eat, hang with my homies, and go around pantsless.

53 shares on Threads this month:

I don’t get involved in anyone’s business, let alone their drama. You should try it.

25 shares on Facebook this month:

I don’t drink blood to stay young. I do it mainly for the lifestyle.

89 shares on X this month:

One day you’re young and fun, and the next you’re saying, “I wonder how old this tree is.”

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

Twitter is cool because you can figure out what’s going on in the world through memes instead of watching the news.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has viewed:

Welcome to social media. A person who does not understand humor will contact you shortly.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Why would I spend money on the zoo when I can watch my colleagues for free?

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

My brain doesn’t sea typos until I’ve already hit send.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

After I get irritated, it takes me about 2 hours to fix my face.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

Now if you’ll excuse me, today’s bad decisions aren’t going to make themselves.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

If a door closes, I’m just going to open it again.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has downloaded:

Good morning to the wind beneath my wings only.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

I’m at the age where I have to warm up first before jumping to conclusions.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on TikTok:

We always asked “where is Waldo” but never “who is Waldo hiding from”.

Making waves on Pinterest:

You don’t scare me, you’re not my kid noticing her sibling got a bigger slice of cake.

Seen just now on Twitch:

You tell people you’re not trying to drink and they act like you just turned down 100k.

Trending via Pinterest:

Songs discovered from movies are usually a masterpiece.

Going viral on YouTube:

Just because talking is for you doesn’t mean that starting a podcast is.

Shared recently on X:

Playing Mortal Kombat at an arcade in the 90’s would fix me.

Trending via Pinterest:

I need a Netflix show called: “Background noise while you scroll on your phone.”

Making waves on WhatsApp:

They say money talks, but mine just waves goodbye.

Just shared via Twitch:

There are two types of people at work: Those who work and those who have become pros at looking busy.

Spotted on Pinterest:

The date didn’t go well but she was nice enough to send a PDF of everything I did wrong afterwards.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

In honor of Charles Dickens, I will also be poor this Christmas.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I’m gonna be the first zoomer to start dropping the ‘two thousand’ when referring to the past. “Yeah, that was back in ‘17.”

If a demon ever possessed me, I’d just sit back and say, “Your problem now.”

I wish more dumb people were shy.

I am not someone you have to entertain if you invite me, because I will have canceled.

In a parallel universe, there’s a happy me.

I can still drop it like it’s hot. It’s just a lot harder to pick it back up.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨