It’s leg day. No, not at the gym, dummy. I’m shaving them.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has downloaded:

Reverse cowgirl so I can bend backward and look at him like the Exorcist.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

“You’re like cherry lip gloss. I just can’t get enough.”

Someone from 🇮🇶 has shared:

The tag on my jeans says “Relaxed” so it obviously doesn’t have children.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

I wonder how many calories I can burn petting my cat.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has downloaded:

Giving people access to the internet was a massive mistake.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

The worst part about being drunk and seeing double is when you realize it’s just one slice of pizza.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Get a Ring camera so you can yell at your kids when they’re out front and freak them out.