Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇪 has downloaded:

Sick and tired of these 30 mins weekends.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

I’ve tasted long-term relationships, I’ve tasted casual dating. I highly recommend focusing on your career and going to sleep before 9 p.m. ..!

Someone from 🇺🇬 has viewed:

Imagine how much better the world would be if everyone set aside their differences and came together as one to buy me a castle.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

The guy in the stall beside doesn’t know he can shut off his camera shutter.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

I stopped understanding math when the alphabet decided to get involved.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

“You’re not allowed to be grumpy on a Friday, it’s in the fine print somewhere.”

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

Metallica’s “Nothing Else Matters” is my favorite song about that 5 minutes of sleep before the alarm goes off.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

Update on my fitness journey: My wife just handed me a bag of apples at the market and said, “careful, it’s heavy.”

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

Books are so cool because there are no bloody ads in them.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

For the record, I use a turntable.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

300 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,569

Funny Quotes Topics

17,627

Funny Quotes Images

15,569

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,433

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Twitch:

My life is ruined. I wish to live no more. Never mind, I found the remote.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

What beautiful weather outside. I’m gonna close the curtains.

Trending via Reddit:

Sick and tired of these 30 mins weekends.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Buying new glasses this week, so a whole bunch of you are about to get a whole lot uglier.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Her: how are you still single? Me: it’s easier than you think.

Seen just now on Messenger:

Someone at work is gonna suggest you download Outlook and Teams on your phone, and it’s very important that you don’t listen to them.

Trending via Discord:

Girls expect handwritten letters from guys who copy birthday wishes from ChatGPT.

Just landed via Telegram:

Spotify: enjoy the next 30 minutes commercial free. Also Spotify: we have no concept of time.

Going viral on Twitch:

“Seize the day!” No thank you. I will leave the day alone and hope it extends me the same courtesy.

I’ve spent years struggling to prove that the sunk-cost fallacy isn’t actually a fallacy. No sense in giving up now, though.

20 hours ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Still working on my PhD in stubbornness! 😂💼🎓

actually, fallacy, giving, giving up, humor, persistence, proof, prove, sense, spent, struggle, sunk-cost, sunk-cost fallacy

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

But he was so nice on the prison phone calls.

2 months ago

calls, conversation, humor, irony, nice, phone, prison, unexpected
Getting a wax is wild, like you really just be bust open talking to the lady like it’s nothing.

4 months ago

awkward, awkward moment, beauty, beauty treatment, conversation, getting, humor, just, lady, moment, nothing, open, talking, treatment, wax, waxing, wild
I’m a bit of a traditionalist, so on my birthday, I smear my body with embryonic fluid.

2 months ago

birthday, bit, body, embryonic, embryonic fluid, fluid, humor, humorous, i, joke, quirky, satire, traditionalist, unconventional
Walking that line between “The internet is great” and “The internet is a mistake” daily.

2 months ago

contradiction, daily, daily struggle, feelings, great, humor, internet, life, line, mistake, mixed, mixed feelings, online, online life, struggle, walking
Grape soda doesn’t taste at all like grapes, but it does taste like purple, and I don’t know how to explain that.

2 months ago

association, color, color association, comparison, explain, flavor, flavor comparison, grape, grape flavor, grape soda, humor, humor in taste, i, know, perception, purple, sensory, sensory perception, soda, taste
Is there anyone here old enough to remember when typing was a class in high school?

5 months ago

anyone, class, education, enough, here, high, high school, humor, memory, nostalgia, old, remember, school, technology, typing

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

23 shares on Pinterest this month:

Can someone please just give me a participation trophy for making it through today, please?

55 shares on Snapchat this month:

Can it still be an emotional support animal if the animal doesn’t want to participate? Asking for my cat.

49 shares on Snapchat this month:

Coffee doesn’t even make me feel energized, I just drink it for the love of the game.

74 shares on Discord this month:

Just got revenge on someone who wronged me many, many years ago. Never relax, I’m coming.

50 shares on X this month:

I don’t know who needs to hear this right now, but it’s time to fold the laundry that’s been lying around since last Sunday.

79 shares on Discord this month:

Libraries were a good start, but we really need to keep working on the number of places where people shouldn’t be allowed to talk.

59 shares on Discord this month:

Explain it to me like I’m 5 drinks in.

90 shares on YouTube this month:

I can handle most things in life, but hearing people chew isn’t one of them.

57 shares on Slack this month:

Sometimes you just need to eat shredded cheese straight out of the bag.

19 shares on Threads this month:

Body: Okay, sleepy time. Brain: Okay, thinky time.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

69 but we both just farting.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

I get shy when my man stares at me for too long because what if he’s realizing I’m actually a lil ugly.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has copied:

When a documentary starts with an old person going, ‘We’re a small town, we didn’t lock our doors at night,’ oh, we’re gonna find out what made them start.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

Oh, I have Christmas spirit. The question is: Do I mix it with coke or do I drink it neat?

Someone from 🇲🇨 has viewed:

I accidentally messed up my life. How do I start a new account?

Someone from 🇳🇪 has bookmarked:

UK rappers be like “I’ve got a posh flat and my bird is very comely, I own more motors than the marchioness of cholmondeley”

Someone from 🇷🇸 has viewed:

My dream car is a taco truck.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

Anxiety should have a loyalty rewards program.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has copied:

My superpower is giving you the middle finger using my eyes only.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

You’re so vain. You probably think me being in this tree outside your house is about you.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Accidentally falling asleep on the couch is somehow always the best sleep.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I’m intermittent fasting, so I have to finish this cake really quick before 6 pm.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Science has enough bodies, I’m donating mine to English lit just to spice things up a bit.

Live now on Messenger:

Annoyed because I want to live my life without a job.

Breaking via Messenger:

“Nobody wants to work anymore!” Personally, I have never wanted to work.

Shared recently on WeChat:

“Because my hair is not done” is a very valid reason to decline an outing.

Just landed via Threads:

The older I get, the more I start to understand the appeal of birdwatching as a hobby. I do find myself watching these little troublemakers quite often.

Just landed via Discord:

The first step to recovery is addiction.

Going viral on YouTube:

I wish religion made people nicer to each other.

Trending via TikTok:

When I tell a joke that doesn’t land, I follow up with a worse one to make my audience realize how good they had it with the first joke.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’ve spent years struggling to prove that the sunk-cost fallacy isn’t actually a fallacy. No sense in giving up now, though.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

But he was so nice on the prison phone calls.

Getting a wax is wild, like you really just be bust open talking to the lady like it’s nothing.

I’m a bit of a traditionalist, so on my birthday, I smear my body with embryonic fluid.

Walking that line between “The internet is great” and “The internet is a mistake” daily.

Grape soda doesn’t taste at all like grapes, but it does taste like purple, and I don’t know how to explain that.

Is there anyone here old enough to remember when typing was a class in high school?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨