Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇼 has shared:

I’ll find a cell mate before I’ll ever find a soulmate.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has shared:

I’m going to hell in every religion.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

I can’t wait til I have hearing aids, so I can just turn them off when I’m tired of hearing everyone.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

Dating these days is like trusting a crackhead to come back with your change.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

This body is a temple; I suicide bomb every day.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

I always imagined WWIII would be Earth vs. aliens.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

I can still drop it like it’s hot. It’s just a lot harder to pick it back up.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

I need a vacation, but the kind where everyone else leaves, and I have my house to myself for a few days.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

Forget carrying me to bed; carry me to the end of the workweek. Then we can talk.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has shared:

The clitoris has 8,000 nerves, if you gonna get on my nerves, get on one of those.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,752

Funny Quotes Topics

17,765

Funny Quotes Images

15,752

Updated

Jan 20, 2026

Users Online

3,694

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Life is short, flirt with me!

Going viral on X:

Kendrick inspires me to be a bigger, deeper, more passionate hater.

Spotted on Snapchat:

If consuming too much caffeine causes short-term memory loss, just imagine what consuming too much caffeine can do.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Showering at night is so sexy and clean and self-care vibes. Showering in the morning is so productivity core, cog in the machine core.

Spotted on X:

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror.

Just landed via Messenger:

I can’t sleep good when I know the food is feeling cold in the fridge.

Going viral on Messenger:

I have lots of hidden talents. The problem is, even I can’t find them.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

“Have AI summarize this email for you!” No thanks, I can read what the person actually said in the way they intended.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Windmill? Big fan.

216 Funny aging quotes

More funny aging quotes 👇

Welcome to your 50s, your knees will now decide when you will sit down.

3 months ago

50s, aging, body, changes, health, humor, knees, life, life changes, sit, sit down, welcome
My body cracks like a glow stick every time I move, but refuses to light up.

3 months ago

aging, body, cracks, every, fitness, glow, glow stick, humor, i, light, move, noise, pain, stick, time
The older I get, the less surprised I’d be if a random body part just fell off one day.

3 months ago

aging, body, body part, changes, day, getting, getting older, humor, i, just, less, life, life changes, older, randomness, surprise
With age comes wisdom. And digestive trouble.

3 months ago

age, aging, digestive, digestive trouble, health, humor, lessons, life, life lessons, trouble, wisdom
You are only young once. After that you have to think up some other excuse.

3 months ago

aging, excuse, experience, growing, growing up, humor, life, think, young, youth
I found my first grey pubic hair today, but I didn’t freak out; unlike everyone else in the Zoom meeting.

3 months ago

aging, aging humor, everyone, found, freak, freak out, funny moment, grey, grey hair, hair, humor, i, meeting, moment, pubic, pubic hair, reaction, surprise, surprise reaction, today, Zoom, Zoom meeting

For even more funny aging quotes, hit next 👇

All funny aging quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

19 shares on Pinterest this month:

You are depressed because your ancestors fought, danced, and ate meals together, and you eat alone in the dark while staring at a glowing rectangle.

61 shares on YouTube this month:

Is there really anything worse than being forced to watch a video on someone else’s phone and having to pretend to laugh for 2 minutes?

74 shares on Messenger this month:

I just want someone who can see through all my bullshit and hate me for who I really am.

91 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m just going to be hotter. It’s easier than being nicer.

90 shares on Slack this month:

In English we say: “You changed.” But in poetry we say: “You became a stranger wearing the face I used to love, and I am haunted by the ghost of who you were.”

87 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m always happy when I come home from shopping and the note on the table reminds me of what I wanted to buy.

65 shares on Pinterest this month:

Listen to the birds, not the news.

59 shares on Reddit this month:

I love convincing myself iced coffee counts as hydration and self-care.

18 shares on TikTok this month:

An alcoholic morning show host becoming Secretary of War is some Kurt Vonnegut shit.

70 shares on LinkedIn this month:

As a child, I had the impression that I would be offered free drugs by strangers much more frequently than the 0 times it’s happened.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Dear predictive text, I am tired of sending people “Thanksgiving” when they send me a recipe or directions.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

Your brain needs exercise just as much as your body does. That’s why I think of running everyday.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

My husband said I use a lot of makeup, so I showed him some makeup tutorials on TikTok and I don’t think he’ll be making that mistake again.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has viewed:

Preparing for my beach vacation by watching Jaws.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has shared:

Was complaining to my mom about my daughter’s attitude and she told me I should’ve named her payback.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

Ugh, but profoundly.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has downloaded:

If you have nothing nice to say, I promise you that I’ll have something even worse to say back.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

Lost my job to AI (my job was to be loudly and confidently incorrect).

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

The first Saw movie should have been called Footloose.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

Every McDonald’s should have a flag they fly at half mast when the ice cream machine is down.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Twitch:

Women watch Netflix with subtitles because they don’t know how to listen.

Going viral on Reddit:

Signing all emails with BOOM SHAKALAKA today.

Seen just now on Slack:

Opera is when a guy gets stabbed in the back and, instead of bleeding, he sings.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I missed out on drowning tragically young in a suburban swimming pool.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

Ever read something so magnificently stupid that you have to just stare into space for a little while and reconcile with your brain for having been subjected to it?

Just shared via Snapchat:

Sometimes life is like a cowshed. You step from one turd into the next.

Making waves on TikTok:

I need someone to wring out my brain like a dishrag.

Just shared via Messenger:

Being sleepy all day is just part of who I am.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Daffodil totally sounds like an insult, you blooming daffodil.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I bet the guy who named the sperm whale wasn’t allowed to name things anymore after that.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

216 Funny aging quotes

More funny aging quotes 👇

Welcome to your 50s, your knees will now decide when you will sit down.

My body cracks like a glow stick every time I move, but refuses to light up.

The older I get, the less surprised I’d be if a random body part just fell off one day.

With age comes wisdom. And digestive trouble.

You are only young once. After that you have to think up some other excuse.

I found my first grey pubic hair today, but I didn’t freak out; unlike everyone else in the Zoom meeting.

All funny aging quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨