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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Told a couple of jokes at a Zoom meeting. Turns out I’m not even remotely funny.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

Sunday should be 48 hours instead of 24 hours, I need more time to be ready for Monday.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

I want to text this person, but I need to have shame and self-respect.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

No more relationships for me; the last one was an embarrassment to my gangsta.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

Anyone who thinks things have got so bad that they can only get better is showing a remarkable lack of imagination.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has viewed:

Our parents used to drop us off at school with no water bottle, no phone and no snacks, yet somehow we survived.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

Blackout curtains because I’ll decide what time it is.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

I don’t simply want to kill a mosquito; I want to bite them back over and over to make them itch.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

Do y’all watch the results come or do you go to bed and wait to see what Democracy Claus left you in the morning?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2433 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,595

Funny Quotes Topics

15,263

Funny Quotes Images

12,595

Updated

49 minutes ago

Users Online

3,466

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Spewing nonsense online is the most fun a depressed person is allowed to have in these twisted times.

Live now on YouTube:

I be like, “I needed this,” and it’s just me getting drunk.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

On the upside, my kids are helping with the dishes. On the downside, my kids are helping with the dishes.

Just shared via Facebook:

Ghosting is actually a sign of great respect in my culture.

Trending via YouTube:

You guys know your secrets are safe with me. It’s the people I share them with you can’t trust.

Just shared via Threads:

Shout out to people jogging in this heat, no, seriously, shout out to make sure they’re okay.

Trending via X:

Welcome to your 40s: it’s Saturday night so you know what that means, absolutely nothing, go to bed.

Going viral on Twitch:

I love how this generation broke the previous misconception that “people with tattoos can’t get good jobs” and now we all agree that “people with and without tattoos can’t get good jobs”.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

My bed is from Ikea, so it’s more unstable than i am.

Spotted on Telegram:

I don’t see why walking is healthy. Zombies walk constantly and they look awful.

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45 Funny breakup quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2433 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,595

Funny Quotes Topics

15,263

Funny Quotes Images

12,595

Updated

49 minutes ago

Users Online

3,448

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇭 has shared:

You didn’t get fired, your job “fumbled you”.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has downloaded:

I’m bad at being sad. Three mins later, I’m making jokes about my situation.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

Money can’t buy happiness, until you’re on vacation and then you realize it definitely can.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has downloaded:

I love the idea of a fruitarian, just morally affronted that anyone could eat a baby spinach.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

I’m tired of pretending talking about the weather isn’t fun.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

You should be allowed to miss work if you’re not feeling sexy.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

Have come to the devastating realization that I am an over-nodder on video calls.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

Welcome to adulthood: you’re always sleepy unless you’re trying to get to sleep.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

I will never understand people’s fascination with their ancestry, isn’t knowing your current family bad enough.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

I forgot how to panic. Help!

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on YouTube:

Asking the birds outside my window if they know any Metallica.

Going viral on YouTube:

Only mosquitoes find me attractive. Nobody else.

Seen just now on Facebook:

If you only watched reality TV dating shows, you would probably estimate the number of people who work in medical device sales in the United States to be approximately 80,000,000.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

The Gen Z stare. The millennial pause. Instead, let’s talk about the boomer inappropriate personal question.

Shared recently on Instagram:

The universe consists of 5% protons, 5% neutrons, 5% electrons, and 85% morons.

Just shared via Reddit:

I’m capable of doing a lot of things but listening to people chew their food is not one of them.

Broadcasted on X:

Hiring a mortician to do my makeup while I sleep.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Any place is a walkable city if you’re broke enough.

Breaking via Telegram:

When I look at the world, I realize why Noah only took animals with him.

Making waves on Threads:

The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning “ability to,” and bics, meaning “withstand tremedous boredom.”

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