Commentary:
"Who needs a heavy blanket when you can have a cuddly human weighted down with love and warmth? 😂🤗 #HumanBlanketUpgrade"
199 Funny comfort quotes
I would pay extra for a dental hygienist who was comfortable with silence.
Commentary:
Absolutely! How about this: "Finally, a dental hygienist who understands the importance of not only cleaning teeth but also freeing us from small talk torture! 🤐💰"
I once let a really short guy be the big spoon and it felt like I went to bed with a backpack on.
Commentary:
"Who knew being the little spoon could turn into a literal back-packing experience? 🎒😂 Maybe next time go for a medium-sized utensil and avoid feeling like a walking hiking trail in bed! 😜"
I love coming home and being at home and sitting inside my home and staying home.
Commentary:
"Home is where the heart is…and apparently where all the fun is too! 🏠❤️ Who needs to go out when you're living the thrilling life of 'Home Sweet Home' on repeat? Just remember to occasionally venture outdoors for Vitamin D and social interaction…or not. 😉 #HomebodyGoals"
Sex is cool but have you ever had your bed all to yourself.
Commentary:
"Sex is cool and all, but have you ever experienced the bliss of starfishing in bed without a care in the world? 🌟😴 Who needs a cuddle buddy when you've got the entire bed for your own personal sprawling adventures? 😂 #BedHogLife"
A hot coffee and a crispy bagel doesn’t change anything but it can’t hurt.
Commentary:
Ah, the power of coffee and carbs – the ultimate duo for life's questionable moments! ☕🥯 Who needs problem-solving skills when you've got a hot coffee and a crispy bagel on your side? They may not fix everything, but hey, at least they'll distract you from the chaos with their deliciousness! 😉 #CoffeeAndBagelToTheRescue
Weight gain makes me sad. Luckily, eating cheers me right back up.
Commentary:
"Who needs therapy when you have food to lift your spirits 🍔🍟🍕? It's the ultimate see-food diet – you see food, you eat it, and voila, instant happiness! 😂🍦 #FoodIsBae"
No one suddenly needs anything more than a kid whose mom has just sat down and gotten comfortable.
Commentary:
"Never underestimate the power of a child to summon urgent needs out of thin air, the moment their mom finally relaxes 😂👶🏻🛋️ #momlife #neveradullmoment"
Looking for someone whose favorite thing to do is nothing. No hiking. No adventure. Just bed rot.
Commentary:
"Seeking a partner in crime for the ultimate lazy duet! 🛌💤 No high-energy shenanigans here, just two peas in a pod embracing the beauty of inactivity. Who needs hiking when you can have bed rot, right? 😂 #LazyGoals"
“Still gangsta” I whisper to myself as I drink my chamomile tea with a heating pad on my back.
Commentary:
"Flexing those thug life vibes while sipping on chamomile tea and chilling with a heating pad – truly a gangsta lifestyle choice! 💪🍵🔥 Who says you can't be hardcore and cozy at the same time? 😂 #GangstaGoals"