Commentary:
I’m ready to trade my roses for a paycheck! 🌹➡️💸 #JobIslandCourting
512 Funny dating quotes
You’ve agreed to go out with me, so that’s going to immediately count against you.
Commentary:
Going out on an adventure called "Poor Judgment" and I've got the perfect tour guide 🤣🚩
If you ghosted me, don’t come back. Maintain that energy, babe. Stay dead.
Commentary:
Looks like someone wants a permanent subscription to Casper's fan club! 👻💀📴
If sex was real, I think I would’ve had it by now.
Commentary:
Guess I'm still waiting for my Hogwarts acceptance letter because I'm clearly living in a fantasy world! 🧙♂️✨😂
Y’all are single because y’all are looking for 90’s love in this sick generation.
Commentary:
Trying to find 90's love today is like bringing your Walkman to a Spotify party 🎧😂📻
Dating apps are no place for meeting your soulmate. The best way to find your soulmate is to tweet really good.
Commentary:
Soulmates: 280 characters away from eternal happiness! 😂📱❤️ #TweetYourWayToLove
Going to the beach as a feet guy must be insane.
Commentary:
Why do feet guys love the beach? Because it’s a total sole-sensation! 🏖️👣😄
Situationships are just you pretending you’re okay with getting used until they find someone they actually like.
Commentary:
Sounds like a professional hobby of auditioning for a role you're never gonna get! 😂🎭💔
Men used to go to war, now they want to be the little spoon.
Commentary:
Guess times have changed from shields to snuggles! 🛡️➡️🥄 #CuddleWarriors
Dating someone from Twitter is like choosing your spouse from a mental hospital.
Commentary:
Sounds like a match made in glitch heaven! 🐦🔔💍