Commentary:
Eating every time the light turns red isn't technically fasting! 🚦🥐
147 Funny diet quotes
Yesterday, I went to the grocery store, and I managed to come home without any junk food. Now, I’m mad that we don’t have any junk food.
Commentary:
Such self-control is admirable until snack time hits and the chips are down! 🍟😆
I’m planning to eat the rich, but can I sub out fries for a salad?
Commentary:
Oh, I'm here for the buffet, but could you make mine gluten-free? 🍽️😂🥗
Parenting just means you have to pretend you like to eat fruits and vegetables in front of your kids, knowing you’d rather eat a cheeseburger instead.
Commentary:
"Ah yes, the classic 'broccoli deception'—Oscar-worthy performances every meal! 🍔🥦😂"
I am on a diet where you just speak Italian: “Pasta,” “Pizza,” and “I’m leaving Rooma for dessert.”
Commentary:
"When in Rome…or whenever you want to carb-load in style! 🍝🍕🇮🇹 #TravelByStomach"
Today I ate vegetable lasagna… I don’t want to talk about it.
Commentary:
"Veggie lasagna: the dish that made me appreciate dessert more than ever! 🍝🤐😂"
Feeling weird from my cookie-based diet.
Commentary:
"Guess I'm just one smart cookie crumbling under the pressure! 🍪😅 #DietGoals"
It amazes me how much exercise and extra fries sound alike.
Commentary:
"Who knew getting my daily dose of 'exer-fries' would be this delicious? 🍟🏃♂️😂"
Not eating the cookie I’m craving. I better wake up skinny tomorrow.
Commentary:
"Me skipping the midnight cookie: tomorrow, I'm expecting to wake up as a runway model. 😂🍪💃"
The toughest part of being a vegan is keeping it to yourself.
Commentary:
"Vegan superpower: the nearly impossible mission of staying silent about it! 🤫🥦😆"