Wordgag πŸŽ…

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡³ has viewed:

I delete posts cause I be getting mature over the hours.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡Ή has bookmarked:

Until further notice the days of the week are now called thisday, thatday, otherday, someday, yesterday, today and nextday!

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡© has viewed:

At my age I don’t sleep, I nap between pee breaks.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡² has copied:

Worst part about not buying snacks so you won’t eat snacks is not having snacks when you need a lil snack.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡΄ has bookmarked:

Sobriety: because my standards got tired of lowering themselves.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Ύ has shared:

Not the sharpest cheddar on the charcuterie board.

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡¦ has bookmarked:

April Fool’s next week and still no one has asked me to be their fool.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡Ή has bookmarked:

People say opposites attract, but I say find a partner who’s deranged in the same ways you are and double your capacity to be annoying.

Someone from πŸ‡»πŸ‡¨ has shared:

ChatGPT is down right now and if you listen closely, you can hear millions of content creators screaming.

Someone from πŸ‡ΆπŸ‡¦ has copied:

For a guy supposedly called my “brother,” I’ve never seen him make broth even once.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,762

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Spotted on Telegram:

β€œYou’re a cougar!” God forbid a woman gives back to the youth.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

For Halloween, you should be mine.

Going bananas on Discord:

On the internet it’s super easy to take credit for stuff you had nothing to do with. That’s why I invented it.

Broadcasted on X:

I’m so tired of not being a multimillionaire.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Stop using ChatGPT. I can feed you misinformation too and I’m also beautiful and funny sometimes.

Just landed via Telegram:

If you’re not easily offended, why are you even online?

Spotted on X:

So annoying that in order to meet new people you need to go out and meet new people. Ideally, I would have known you in a past life.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

I got bills. They’re multiplying.

Going bananas on Reddit:

Why is bacon called bacon and cookies called cookies if you cook bacon and bake cookies?

Making waves on Facebook:

The Jaws theme stays on during sex.

Home Β» Funny Early Riser Quotes

Funny early riser quotes

Funny early riser quotes πŸŒ… are the perfect way to add some humor to those groggy mornings β˜•οΈπŸ˜΄. Whether you’re a sunrise lover or a reluctant alarm clock victim, these witty lines will have you chuckling before your first coffee β˜•οΈπŸ˜‚. Ready to embrace the day with a smile and a laugh? Let’s dive into some playful takes on waking up way too early! 🌞😜

New funny early riser quotes πŸ‘‡

All funny early riser quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes πŸ‘Œ

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! πŸ˜‰βœŒοΈ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. πŸ˜‚πŸ’₯

πŸŽπŸŽ…πŸŽ„ Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

77 shares on Slack this month:

Life on other planets be like: “I hope those lunatics don’t discover us!”

68 shares on TikTok this month:

My daughter’s morning alarm is less to wake her up, and more to warn the rest of us.

41 shares on TikTok this month:

Ribbed condoms don’t even taste like ribs.

83 shares on X this month:

What a strange day. And it has been for years.

88 shares on Threads this month:

I want to make you say, β€œOh God,” in a way that makes God nervous.

89 shares on Reddit this month:

The Gulf of Mexico should’ve been renamed to Sea SeΓ±or.

72 shares on Twitch this month:

Buying books and reading them are actually two entirely different hobbies.

80 shares on Reddit this month:

This call, should’ve been a message in a bottle I never found.

64 shares on Facebook this month:

My husband and I were doing yard work, but I started a fight so I could storm off into the air conditioning.

22 shares on WeChat this month:

The little umbrella is so unnecessary. Like, my drink is already wet, bro.

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes πŸ’₯

9 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Britney Spears working at an ice-cream shop called ‘Scoops, I did it again.’

20 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Instead of cleaning my house, I just watch episodes of hoarders on TV and then I think “Wow, my house looks awesome!”

8 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Thoughts more intrusive than a 90s sitcom neighbor.

24 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

The era where you dropped your phone and your battery flew out was just crazy.

23 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

People pleasing doesn’t go well with my black attire.

10 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

On my way to HR again for nicknaming my coworker “Mastercard” because they take credit for other people’s work.

21 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I use a headshot from 2008 on my LinkedIn to prepare future employers for disappointment.

8 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Please just wait until my mating ritual is over before you decide.

15 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Can I come over and be your midnight snack?

5 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Ghosting is disrespectful unless it’s me doing it.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

501 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,094

Funny Quotes Topics

17,246

Funny Quotes Images

15,094

Updated

Dec 22, 2025

Users Online

3,690

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡Ό has viewed:

I only see psychics so that I can keep arguing with dead relatives.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡± has bookmarked:

How long past date can I eat eggs? Like are they still good or am I naming them now?

Someone from πŸ‡¨πŸ‡Ί has viewed:

This Monday has Monday written all over it.

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡¬ has copied:

YOLO because stupid people don’t know what Carpe Diem means.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡― has bookmarked:

I hate that I’m so indecisive. Actually, I don’t know if hate is the right word.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡Ύ has viewed:

β€œThe only thing standing between you and your dreams is you!” Yeah, have you met me? That’s gonna be a problem.

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡΄ has bookmarked:

Don’t be part of the problem. Be all of it.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡Ή has viewed:

People in glass houses shouldn’t throw orgies.

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡³ has copied:

Big decision to make? Sleep on it. Have a nightmare. Then you’ll be operating on pure adrenaline and will choose more quickly.

Someone from πŸ‡«πŸ‡― has bookmarked:

I can’t wait to retire so I can get up at 6 a.m. and go drive around really slow and make everybody late for work.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Freshly posted on Instagram:

The secret ingredient to being really funny is childhood trauma.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

If you saw me licking the plate after the charcuterie was finished, no you didn’t.

Just landed via WeChat:

It’s so important to have people in your life who expand your snack horizons.

Going viral on X:

I could have been the favorite mistress of the Sun King at Versailles, but nooooooooo I had to be born into late stage capitalism.

Making waves on Messenger:

Starting to think business is standing on me.

Just landed via WeChat:

Weekends are getting shorter and shorter. You blink and it’s already Sunday 5pm.

Making waves on YouTube:

I’m running out of people I like.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Crazy to think that even after all of these years the Titanic’s pool still has water in it.

Spotted on Facebook:

Manipulative people really be like “oh, so now I’m the bad guy for being the bad guy?”

Seen just now on Messenger:

Does everyone’s inner monologue have a laugh track?

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