Funny expired quotes

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  4 weeks ago

  Share →: For my birthday, I want everyone to delete whatever old version of me they have in their head— it expired.

  …

  Commentary:
  🎉🧠 "Heads up, everyone! It's like software updates, but for me! Time to hit 'refresh' and wave bye-bye to those old versions! 🚫🗑️🤣"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Grocery shopping before Christmas is a nightmare. My milk expired while I was waiting in line.

  Commentary:
  "Trying to survive the grocery store before Christmas is like going on a wild expedition through the jungle. 🛒🎄 Don't worry, your milk may have expired, but at least you've gained some battle scars in the form of long checkout lines! 💥😂"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: My main takeaway from ‘The Walking Dead’ is that you can still eat the expired canned goods in your pantry.

  Commentary:
  "Well, at least 'The Walking Dead' taught us a practical survival tip: when the zombies come knocking, don't worry about the expiration date on those canned beans 🧟‍♂️🥫 Just pray they're still edible and won't turn you into a member of the undead pantry patrol! 😂 #ApocalypseDining"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I am so incredibly tired today. I think my shelf life has expired.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like it's time for a shelf makeover! 🛠️ Don't worry, you're not expired, just a vintage classic ready for a little TLC. 💤 #TimeForANap"

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