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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇧 has copied:

Weekends are a scam. You spend one day exhausted and the other anxious… like, what was that?

Someone from 🇰🇳 has bookmarked:

Yeah, sex is cool and all, but have you ever crawled out of the worst depression of your life and got your spark back?

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

My personal brand is being the guest at a wedding who can’t dance but puts in a noticeable effort.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has downloaded:

You are the Monday of my life.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

Money can’t buy happiness, until you’re on vacation and then you realize it definitely can.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

You’d be surprised how many times you can use the word succulent in a work email.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

Told my girl I’m tired of her dramas and she bought me an energy drink.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has copied:

Ozzy Osbourne has mumbled through entire sentences, and I still understood him better than most of my exes.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

I have some cake and now I’m eating it too. Not seeing the problem here.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

I like my money where I can see it: hanging in my closet.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,684

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I’m glad it’s not snowing. I can’t imagine shoveling snow in this heat.

Making waves on Telegram:

Can’t wait to overuse the “My husband said,” “Let me phone my husband,” “I’ll ask my husband.”

Making waves on LinkedIn:

“Apple Music has better sound quality!” Okay, but my entire life is on Spotify, my playlists are my children.

Spotted on WeChat:

Who you are before you have your coffee is the real you.

Seen just now on Discord:

Let’s tell the truth cell phone. I don’t have six missed calls. I have six ignored calls.

Just shared via Facebook:

Halloween pumpkins look even scarier if you just use the ones from last year.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Nothing gets my heart pumping like receiving an annoying newsletter.

Going bananas on Messenger:

Welcome to your 40’s: you’re not hungover, it’s just Tuesday.

Making waves on WeChat:

Went to bed with wet hair and woke up looking like I might know a lot about astrophysics.

Shared recently on WeChat:

There are drug-sniffing dogs, guide dogs, dogs that save lives. And then there’s my dog, who hits the lead when he poops.

Funny graduation quotes

Funny graduation quotes bring the perfect blend of laughter and celebration to your big day 🎓😂 Whether you’re dodging clichés or just need a witty line to lighten the mood, these playful gems will have everyone smiling from cap toss to diploma clutch 🎉😄 Get ready to add some humor to your speeches, cards, or social feeds and make graduation unforgettable! 🎈🎉

New funny graduation quotes 👇

All funny graduation quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

93 shares on Facebook this month:

The sexual tension between me and not finishing the last 2 episodes of a drama.

33 shares on X this month:

Less is more, unless it’s kindness, sleep, or toilet paper.

74 shares on Threads this month:

What do you mean a baguette isn’t a female bag?

22 shares on TikTok this month:

We can do things one of two ways. My way or my other way.

76 shares on YouTube this month:

Human stupidity exists because if everyone were smart, we’d have no one to laugh at on the internet.

96 shares on X this month:

If I’m too quiet you can rest assured I’m in the process of planning my sweet escape or your equally sweet demise.

82 shares on X this month:

A spoonful of peanut butter from the jar will fix me.

82 shares on Telegram this month:

Stop letting people who are going to hell bother you.

25 shares on Discord this month:

Why do you assume it’s invalid to “make stuff up” during an argument? It shows initiative and creativity.

15 shares on Threads this month:

Instead of presents this year, I’m giving everyone my opinion. Get excited!

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I refuse to go to a blood bank. I’m not taking your blood money.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Wanna know a real adult life hack? Don’t tell anyone when you have a day off. Absolutely no one.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Thinking about ignoring daily mess by creating new holiday decor mess.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Can’t wait to overuse the “My husband said,” “Let me phone my husband,” “I’ll ask my husband.”

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Answering your cell when you don’t recognize the number is like picking up a hitchhiker.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

Not feeling fergalicious today, actually feeling pretty fergusting right now.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Why are they called “grammar Nazis” and not “the Gestypo”?

20 folks are currently checking 👀

People need to understand the difference between want and need. Like, I want abs, but I need chocolate.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Damn girl, are you a plate of microwaved leftovers? Because you’re hot on the outside and cold on the inside.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

Maybe somewhere in a parallel universe, I wake up feeling refreshed and energetic each day.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,484

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

I’m so old and have never even met a woman named Jolene. I’d really like to find her, though. She can have my man.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

“Stop talking about old drama!” God forbid a girl and her bestie enjoy their history lessons.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

We keep a potato masher in a drawer because sometimes it’s fun not to be able to open that drawer.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

The concept of dominant hands is hilarious to me. That one of our hands is just like, “No, I’m not helping.”

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

I would love to be the reason you look at your phone and smile. Then walk into a wall.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

This entire year I was method acting. None of it was real. I was working on a bit.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

Some people are living bowel movement to bowel movement.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

The most annoying child in our house is that of my mother-in-law.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

I’ve tasted being the bigger person, I’ve also tasted matching energy. I recommend no contact.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

That feeling when you take the first bite of your favourite food, that’s called chewphoria.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Discord:

The worst part about waking up is all the remembering.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

Putting my Christmas tree up today. Big day for my cats.

Live now on Slack:

I be skipping everyone’s stories but watch mine like 20 times.

Making waves on Discord:

If a demon ever possessed me, I’d just sit back and say, “Your problem now.”

Freshly posted on YouTube:

Going ballistic. Anyone need anything?

Live now on Reddit:

A penguin is a bird the way a hot dog is a sandwich.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

When I trip, I always look back to see who or what did it, because it couldn’t have possibly been my fault.

Just shared via Twitch:

I can’t explain it, but I am very bold and very shy at the same time.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I just want someone who can read a book with me in silence, and then do ungodly things sometimes.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

Golf is a great way to learn all of the new curse words your subconscious has been cooking up in the lab.

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