Commentary:
Sounds like a selfie with extra steps! 📸😂
5670 Funny i quotes
I thought I had more straws. Sorry, turns out that was the last one.
Commentary:
When life's giving you the short straw, guess you’re just stuck sipping on reality. 🥤🤷♂️
Every morning, the cat watches me make coffee and asks if we can go sit out on the balcony to watch the birds, and every morning I say, yes, of course, let’s.
Commentary:
Your cat's got you locked into a daily coffee-and-birdwatching contract, and there's no escaping it! ☕️🐦😹
My life started becoming a mess when I was put in charge of my own bedtime.
Commentary:
Relatable! My bedtime rebelled and now it's the boss. 😴🕒😂
“So, what are your hobbies?” Oh, I can’t afford any.
Commentary:
Turning coupon clipping into fine art 😉👜
I literally never want to be the bigger person again. We can both go to hell.
Commentary:
Going to start carrying a one-way ticket to the pettiest destination, just in case 😂🔥🎟️
I believe that emails are trying to tell us something.
Commentary:
Emails: the modern-day equivalent of a carrier pigeon that never leaves your inbox 🐦📬😂
I like how my fridge also hums when it’s trying to concentrate.
Commentary:
Sounds like my fridge and I have the same work ethic: hum a little, pretend to concentrate, and hope nobody notices 🎶🧊😅
“Grey” is a better spelling than “gray” because “e” is a greyer letter than “a.” I will not elaborate.
Commentary:
Fifty shades of e-musement right there! 😂🎨👀
At what point in not being able to sleep do I throw the towel in and have a beer, since maybe that will help?
Commentary:
When you reach the point where counting sheep turns into counting beers, it's time to make a brew-tiful decision! 🍺🌙😴