Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇲 has downloaded:

Nudes are played out. Send me a video of you reading out loud so I know you’re not dumb.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

It’s pretty apt that the ‘i’ is in the middle of ‘hurricane’.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

I feel like I’m in season 5 of my life, and the writers are just making ridiculous shit happen to keep it interesting.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

Anyone who thinks office jobs are harmless has never cut their finger on paper.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

Fun fact: The US was originally not meant to be a reality TV show.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has shared:

Are cassette tapes considered classical music yet?

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

People who think naps are a waste of time obviously don’t understand how naps work.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has downloaded:

Just when you’ve built some confidence that you’re a smarter than average human, universe sends you captcha.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

Why didn’t Scooby Doo smell that the ghosts were human?

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

Don’t forget to whine and complain about Monday today.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

243 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,512

Funny Quotes Topics

17,578

Funny Quotes Images

15,512

Updated

Jan 7, 2026

Users Online

3,233

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Slack:

I do believe TikTok saves the funniest videos for late at night. There’s no way.

Just landed via Twitch:

My dogs don’t feel earthquakes because they have constant gas.

Going viral on WeChat:

Whispering to paramedic before I pass out: save me, but not enough that I have to go to work tomorrow.

Seen just now on Discord:

I woke up from a deep sleep in a panic thinking I was late for work. Thankfully, I was already there.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Just paid my rent, now I have a warm place to starve in.

Just shared via Reddit:

You’re not going to believe this, but I was doing really well, and then your email found me.

Breaking via Discord:

I should get paid a lot more for being the boss of me.

Trending via Reddit:

Isn’t your email address beautifulgirl@mydreams.com?

Seen just now on Reddit:

No more looking back in anger. It’s time to look forward in anger.

Going bananas on Telegram:

Steve Jobs was a vibe coder. He just prompted Steve Wozniak.

I love spending my parents’ money, they must pay for bringing me into this world.

4 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Guess I'm just following the parental payback plan! 💸😆👶

child, debt, family, finance, humor, i, joke, love, me, money, parenting, parents, pay, spending, world

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Bartender asked me to give his place a one-star Google review to keep the vibe lowkey. Insane method.

0

4 weeks ago

asked, bar, bartender, give, Google, google review, humor, insane, keep, lowkey, me, method, one-star, place, prank, review, vibe
“Are you busy tomorrow?” That entirely depends on what you need me to do.

0

2 months ago

busy, call, depends, me, need, plans, tomorrow
I am losing touch with reality and I couldn’t be happier.

0

2 months ago

am, contentment, happiness, humor, i, losing, losing touch, positivity, reality, touch
There will always be miserable people inviting you to their misery.

0

4 months ago

always, attitude, humor, interaction, invitation, miserable, miserable person, misery, negativity, people, person, social, social interaction
My superpower is to make anyone I wanna make comfortable feel uncomfortable.

0

2 months ago

awkwardness, comfortable, feel, humor, i, irony, personality, skill, social, social skill, superpower, uncomfortable
Some people have goals based on a summer body. Mine revolve entirely around the weight limit of my beach chairs.

0

2 months ago

beach, beach body, people, summer, summer body

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

36 shares on Messenger this month:

Channeling my inner pretzel to achieve expert-level bad posture.

65 shares on Facebook this month:

You ever get surprised by your own recurring issues? Like, come on man, I thought we were past this.

63 shares on X this month:

That feeling when you take the first bite of your favourite food, that’s called chewphoria.

70 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I love people who are fluent in Spongebob references.

83 shares on Threads this month:

Everyone wants a goth girlfriend until she starts doing goth things.

57 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Men have nice skin because they stress out everyone but themselves.

85 shares on Slack this month:

Getting out of bed should count as resistance training.

83 shares on WhatsApp this month:

After ten true crime podcasts you start to think you could probably solve a murder. After a hundred you start to think you could probably get away with one.

64 shares on WeChat this month:

Fitness influencer: It’s important to listen to your body. Body: You’re old. And you want lasagna.

11 shares on Discord this month:

I know I just ate a snack, but I could really use a snack.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

Breaking up is fine, but logging me out of your Netflix is crazy.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

“Winter is literally the best season.” Okay, husky, go sit outside then.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

I have neither the patience nor the crayons to show you why this is a bad idea.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Going “Omgg, that’s crazy,” every time my coworkers talk until it’s time to go home.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has copied:

Facebook is extremely over-engineered for a birthday reminder app.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

Apparently you’re not supposed to announce that there’s been a death in the family every time you kill a houseplant.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

Asking people their favorite color and then calling them liars.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

Having divorced parents as an adult is funny because you and your siblings are like, “Damn, who has custody of Mom today?”

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

The fun thing about Airbnb is that you get to clean someone else’s house on your vacation.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has bookmarked:

By day I am just a regular loser, by night I am the same loser only it’s nighttime.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Threads:

My biggest fear is waking up and being in the Renaissance era or something. Imagine having the knowledge of hot dogs but lacking the tools to make them.

Spotted on TikTok:

Sorry I was late, I was frantically applying to other jobs.

Spotted on Telegram:

Having a pool is so neat. All of your friends are suddenly interested to catch up on the hottest days of the year.

Going bananas on Messenger:

Kids today will never understand how many ninjas there were in the 1980s.

Broadcasted on Discord:

A pessimist is just an optimist playing hard to get.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I aspire to be a stay-at-home mom with no kids.

Spotted on Instagram:

Well, well, well, if it isn’t the holiday traffic I said I’d avoid even though I did nothing to avoid it.

Seen just now on TikTok:

In my 20’s: why is eating healthy such a big deal anyways. In my 40’s: oh.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Cheer up! Your biggest mistake is probably still ahead of you.

Live now on Telegram:

“Your sock has a hole in it!” Yeah, no shit, that’s how I get my foot in there.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I love spending my parents’ money, they must pay for bringing me into this world.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Bartender asked me to give his place a one-star Google review to keep the vibe lowkey. Insane method.

“Are you busy tomorrow?” That entirely depends on what you need me to do.

I am losing touch with reality and I couldn’t be happier.

There will always be miserable people inviting you to their misery.

My superpower is to make anyone I wanna make comfortable feel uncomfortable.

Some people have goals based on a summer body. Mine revolve entirely around the weight limit of my beach chairs.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨