I see why history can repeat itself. People are really stupid.

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Just peed so much that a little laugh came out.

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Can I sell my feelings on ebay, I don’t want them anymore.

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Mixing 1% milk and 2% milk to create the forbidden 1.72% milk.

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I need money, not feelings.

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Every time your mom tells you that she wants the best for you, she is talking about me.

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If life has taught me one thing, it’s that I need more money.

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Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need most.

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You can always tell when a man is dating someone new. Why you going to the aquarium and the museum?

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I deserve a dragon after all I’ve been through.

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Netflix should’ve just maybe mailed us all this fight on DVD.