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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

I no longer dislike Mondays, I’m mature now… I dislike the whole week.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

That awkward moment when you gently throw your phone onto your bed and it decides to bounce off 3 walls, knock over a lamp, and land on the floor.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

They should let you spend one night in a house before you buy/rent it, just to make sure it’s haunted.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

Your fingers have fingertips, but your toes don’t have toetips. Yet, you can tiptoe but not tipfinger.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

They should make a drug that recreates the feeling of having your number called earlier than expected.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

There’s just one legitimate synonym for Friday: boom shakalaka.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

Money talks, but all mine ever says is goodbye.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

Remember: no matter what anyone else thinks of you, it’s how you delude yourself that matters.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

Good morning only to the complexity and uncertainty of everything.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

If you’re looking for another bad decision, I’m here.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1828 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,990

Funny Quotes Topics

14,796

Funny Quotes Images

11,990

2 minutes ago

3,452

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Pinterest:

Breaking news is really breaking me.

Going viral on Telegram:

I’m not sure what everyone at my coworking space does for work, but I’m pretty sure one guy’s job is chewing.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Sorry for not keeping in touch. I literally have nothing to say.

Breaking via Instagram:

Can’t. Typing a password into a TV.

Shared recently on Twitch:

“It’s been a long week!” Me, on a Tuesday.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

It’s not even a crush. it’s just unsupervised hope.

Shared recently on X:

All this overthinking, and I still make the worst decisions.

Just landed via Instagram:

I told my wife the laundry on the couch ain’t gonna fold itself, so if y’all don’t hear from me later, she probably folded me like an omelet.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I like running because it’s cheaper than paying for a gym membership. If the gym wants the money I owe them, they’ll have to catch me.

Just shared via Twitch:

Sorry I was late, I was waiting for my CVS receipt to finish printing.

I’m old enough to remember when rainbows were in black and white.

6 months ago

I’m old enough to remember when rainbows were in black and white.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, the good ol' days when rainbows were in black and white 🌈⚫⚪! Must have been quite the sight to see a grayscale spectrum stretching across the sky. It's like living in a world where Technicolor hadn't been invented yet! Time sure does bring some colorful changes, doesn't it? 😄🌧️

black, black and white, enough, humor, memory, nostalgia, old, rainbow, remember, white

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1828 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,990

Funny Quotes Topics

14,796

Funny Quotes Images

11,990

2 minutes ago

3,452

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

Can drunk people actually not control their actions or is it just an excuse to do some crazy stuff?

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

My train of thought derailed. There were no survivors.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

Things will be fine, eventually—in thousands of years—for rocks.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

My favorite conspiracy theory is that things will get better.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

I’m not climbing a hill if I’m dying. That sounds terrible. I’ll die on this chair. Drinking orange Fanta.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Every time I use self-checkout, the person in front of me has never used self-checkout, touchscreens, or money before.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

Not today, Satan, but next week works.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

Welcome to Twitter, where everyone is an expert on everything.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

The question of whether an employer values its employees is sometimes answered by the toilet paper.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has bookmarked:

A lot of people think you need a lot of money to buy clothes. And they’re right.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Reddit:

I want to sleep but my brain won’t stop talking to itself.

Breaking via LinkedIn:

When someone asks why you don’t have kids just say “dingoes”.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

As long as you’re still fishing fruit flies out of your drink, you’re not drunk.

Live now on Messenger:

Money talks, and also waves goodbye.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Being gracefully insane is the secret to staying somewhat sane in an insane world.

Making waves on Discord:

No, no, I’m listening, it just takes me some time to process so much stupidity all at once.

Just shared via Facebook:

Have y’all tried calories? They’re so good.

Just landed via Pinterest:

If I was the inventor of healing, I would have made it linear, I can tell you that much.

Shared recently on Telegram:

I want to have a penguin that just waddles up to me whenever I’m sad.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Throwing someone under the bus sounds hard, let’s just sell ’em down the river and call it a day.

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