Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

When it gets past my bedtime, I get so scared.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

It’s not my job to police the internet, but I just saw someone post a recipe for a cauliflower cake, and I reported them for harmful content.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

Tequila won’t fix your life, but it’s worth a shot.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

You don’t see people giving bunny ears in photos anymore.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

Adulting is only fun when you have the funds.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

They should make the last foot of dental floss red so you know when you’re about to run out.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has shared:

Instead of presents this year, I’m giving everyone my opinion. Get excited!

Someone from 🇲🇭 has downloaded:

My workout goals are simple: I’d just like to be able to get up off the floor without looking like a turtle trying to flip itself back over.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

Inventing the Grinch: “Santa needs a Wario!”

Someone from 🇲🇺 has bookmarked:

These aliens are taking forever.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,474

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Discord:

I feel like we’re all just angry and horny.

Going viral on Facebook:

Going to therapy is like having someone walk around your brain and going “ohhhh, this is how you’re living?!”

Making waves on TikTok:

Doctors don’t really need to hit you with that rubber hammer, it’s just how they release a lil tension through the day.

Going viral on Twitch:

Every time you break spaghetti noodles in half, an Italian has a stroke.

Shared recently on Reddit:

If you say my name three times in the mirror, I show up and kiss you on the forehead.

Just landed via Reddit:

The brand name Oral B is so funny to me. WTF does the B stand for?

Seen just now on WeChat:

Once you realize I’m an idiot, my posts start to make a lot more sense.

Going viral on Discord:

Wife asked if I could stop singing Wonderwall. I said maybe…

Breaking via WhatsApp:

The feelings I have for Tom Cruise are the closest approximation I have to what patriotism must feel like.

Trending via Snapchat:

Sometimes, I wonder what my life would be like if I had a good haircut.

Thanksgiving should be called Feaster.

Playful words about Thanksgiving, suggesting it should be called 'Feaster' with humorous flair.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who needs thanks when you have feasting on the table? 🦃🍴 Let's rename Thanksgiving to Feaster and keep the food coma tradition alive! 😄🍁 #FoodieFun"

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Keep the laugh going 😂

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

39 shares on Threads this month:

Socks try to be monogamous, but most end up either single or having multiple different partners.

28 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Today marks a five year anniversary of how I’ll start going to the gym tomorrow.

82 shares on Telegram this month:

Crossing my fingers one of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse is single.

68 shares on Instagram this month:

These cannot be the same knees that used to get low in heels at the club.

60 shares on Pinterest this month:

I need carpenters to remember that beds are also for sex. The aesthetics are great and all, but what is with all the squeaking?

42 shares on WeChat this month:

Paid my mortgage so don’t ask me to come out. I’m getting my money’s worth.

10 shares on X this month:

Rapunzel, let down your CVS receipt!

86 shares on Twitch this month:

They should invent health insurance that insures your health.

16 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I wonder if my guardian angel and my future husband’s guardian angel are in a group chat trying to coordinate.

70 shares on X this month:

Old people be like, “No elbows on the table, it’s rude,” then say something racist.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m sorry I lied to you. I only did it for material gain. And to cause you psychological harm. And to prove I’m smarter than you.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Whoever said “Out of sight, out of mind” never had a spider disappear in their bedroom.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Twitter is the most fun you can have on the toilet.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Not sure why I drink anymore. I get the same effect from standing up too fast.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

People always love to claim that a celebrity’s death is “unexpected”, but they never actually release the data on which celebrities they expected to die that day.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

My signature move is forgetting someone’s name 2 seconds after they tell me.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I need a room full of mirrors because I want to be surrounded by winners.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s comical when I lean back in my chair only to realize it’s a stool.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

“I’m going to get more sleep tonight” is always the first lie I tell myself in the morning.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s cute when kids say what they want to be when they grow up. You’re gonna write emails on the computer, buddy.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,554

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

I can’t believe that it’s our turn to give money to our nephews and nieces.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

90% of debugging is just realizing your own stupidity in slow motion.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has shared:

The downside to getting in a hammock is having to get out of the hammock.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has bookmarked:

Hearing my voice in recording makes me wanna apologize to every person I talked to.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

Your ex is ruining someone else’s life now. You are safe.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

Look, babe, I’m sorry. If your fake British accent keeps being this geographically inconsistent, I’m going to have to cancel the medieval roleplay sex.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has viewed:

Job market so bad, I started following my dreams.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

If you’re too open-minded, your brains will fall out.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

I’ve been blocked, unfollowed, and unfriended, but I’ve never been told I’m bad in bed.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

All women want is to consistently annoy one handsome man forever.

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Messenger:

An adult is a person who makes noise when they stand up.

Making waves on TikTok:

Tons of names in my phones are “Kenny Landlord,” “Mike Electric,” or “Pete Do Not Answer,” and I just realized this is how Anglo surnames have always worked.

Spotted on Reddit:

When I’m president, I will add an additional hour between 6 and 7pm.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Don’t put words in my mouth—that’s where the hot dogs go.

Spotted on TikTok:

Sitting with my legs really wide to experiment with gender.

Just shared via Reddit:

That made me feel good. I think I’ll become addicted.

Breaking via X:

Forgetting how to clean the dishes and shooting them with a gun.

Live now on YouTube:

I want to be the kind of person who eats half a grapefruit for breakfast and runs every morning, but I also want to be happy.

Just shared via Reddit:

Sitting on the middle seat of this flight and both my seatmates are reading my book over my shoulder. Should I just start reading it aloud?

Spotted on Reddit:

I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

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