Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇩 has shared:

Girls expect handwritten letters from guys who copy birthday wishes from ChatGPT.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has viewed:

People just don’t stop, collaborate, and listen like they used to.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

Every time my neighbors start moaning, I pause my music to rate the performance.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

Are people born with photographic memories or do they take time to develop?

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

I wish I was as tired in bed at night as I am after lunch at work.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

Your Honor, that doesn’t sound like me.

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

If you ever think English is not a weird language just remember that read and lead rhyme and read and lead rhyme. But read and lead don’t rhyme, and neither do read and lead.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Taking a Hooters waitress on a date to a different Hooters on her night off.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

The lion does not concern himself with social proof.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

Tired of my landlord depending on my rent. Bro, get a job.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,667

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Slack:

Don’t blame a clown for acting like a clown. Ask yourself why you keep going to the circus.

Seen just now on X:

There will only be world peace if we get another Gangnam Style.

Trending via Slack:

Ever since I was little, I knew I wanted people to watch how they speak to me.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Many men also have a walk-in closet. For them, it’s just called a floor.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

I could tell my beard needed a trim when I started seeing some of the pictures my kids were drawing of me.

Seen just now on YouTube:

You should never forget where you came from. That’s probably where your keys are.

Making waves on Instagram:

Remember the good old days when you didn’t have to wonder if the person messaging you was a bot or not?

Spotted on YouTube:

No, I can’t tonight. I already have plans to look at my phone somewhere else.

Freshly posted on Slack:

Whoever named them fitting rooms has a lot of nerve.

Seen just now on Twitch:

I could never give up my dog, he knows too much.

Trying to spend less time on my phone so I can get back to something I’ve loved since childhood: watching TV.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Ah yes, trading thumb workouts for intense couch marathons! 📱➡️📺 #BalanceRestored"

activity, back, childhood, distraction, entertainment, fun, fun activity, hobby, i, leisure, less, phone, screen, screen time, something, spend, time, trying, TV, watching

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I’d be a horrible stalker… I’m always late.

0

2 months ago

always, horrible, horrible stalker, humor, ID, joke, late, procrastination, stalker
This Monday is Mondaying like it’s never Mondayed before.

0

2 months ago

before, frustration, humor, Monday, never, repetition, weekday, workday
I hate porn that starts off with sex. I need to know why they have sex.

0

2 months ago

context, expectations, hate, humor, i, know, need, porn, sex, story, why
Texting random numbers “It’s done.”

0

2 months ago

activity, done, fun, fun activity, joke, miscommunication, number, numbers, prank, random, random number, surprise, texting
This chapter of my life is called “Ummm, okay, I guess whatever.”

0

2 months ago

attitude, called, casual, casual attitude, chapter, guess, humor, i, indifference, life, life chapter, ok, uncertainty, whatever
A man’s home is his castle, but his garage is his sanctuary.

0

2 months ago

castle, garage, home, humor, man, personal, personal space, sanctuary, space

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on YouTube this month:

Getting paid 26 times in 365 days is not my destiny.

16 shares on Instagram this month:

If you compliment me, my glasses fog up.

64 shares on Pinterest this month:

Being alone is my favourite way of being.

91 shares on Threads this month:

“Are you sexually active?” Dude, I’m not even socially active.

12 shares on Snapchat this month:

Got kicked out of reincarnation club for yelling yolo.

59 shares on Messenger this month:

Every cat is a little celebrity to me.

52 shares on Facebook this month:

I am not in a good place, geographically.

79 shares on Telegram this month:

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I’d grow up to be a weird freak.

78 shares on Snapchat this month:

Has anyone ever died from waiting for a group of people to decide what they want to eat.

63 shares on WeChat this month:

Doing all of this just to die in the end! LMAO!

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

Girlhood is sitting down in a boiling hot shower instead of dealing with life.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has viewed:

Doggystyle, so we can both look at the river.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

Listen up. If he hooks his sunglasses in the front collar of his shirt, he’s got something important to say.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

What’s a girl gotta do to feel a dopamine high around here?

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

Just because you are unique, doesn’t mean you are useful.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

Bugs have so many legs to make up for their lack of personality.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has copied:

Slipping into something a little more comfortable (psychosis).

Someone from 🇧🇿 has shared:

3 friends is enough. 1 for the movie theater, 1 for drinks and apps, 1 for texting concerning mental health information.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

Glory hole but for forehead kisses.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

Everyone is either engaged, at a run club, doing their master’s, or in Japan.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Messenger:

Urgh. Trying to buy a copy of Catch-22 online but the seller won’t post it until I’ve paid and I won’t pay until I’ve received it.

Live now on Slack:

Some people exercise every day. Right now, I’m watching a show I don’t like because the remote fell on the floor.

Live now on WhatsApp:

I can’t be bothered with people that can’t be bothered.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

Google AI is awesome because it kills the planet and doesn’t work.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

Just landed via TikTok:

Good morning, especially if they tried to make you go to rehab and you said “no, no, no.”

Just landed via Pinterest:

If robbers ever broke into my house and searched for money, I’d just laugh and search with them.

Going viral on Discord:

I showered with my boyfriend. My breasts have never been so clean! Wow!

Going bananas on Slack:

Would rather walk around a shop 500 times to find something than ask a member of staff who works there like a normal person.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

My boss told me “It’s not rocket science.” Yeah, almost everything that exists is not rocket science.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Trying to spend less time on my phone so I can get back to something I’ve loved since childhood: watching TV.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I’d be a horrible stalker… I’m always late.

This Monday is Mondaying like it’s never Mondayed before.

I hate porn that starts off with sex. I need to know why they have sex.

Texting random numbers “It’s done.”

This chapter of my life is called “Ummm, okay, I guess whatever.”

A man’s home is his castle, but his garage is his sanctuary.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨