Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
🤣🎉 "Turning 50: when your warranty expires and life upgrades you to a model with a built-in laugh track for all those 'ancient' 30-year-olds!"

30s, 50s, ache, age, aging, complaint, everyone, good, humor, laugh, middle, middle age, moan, moaning, pain, welcome

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My advice to kids in kindergarten is to start saving all the money.

1 month ago
advice, kid, kids, kindergarten, money, saving, start
You either have a full ketchup bottle in your house or an almost empty one. There’s no in-between.

1 month ago
bottle, condiment, empty, food, food humor, full, home, house, humor, in-between, ketchup
Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to cancel plans.

1 month ago
activity, cancel, ever, girl, humor, i, introvert, little, plans, social, wanted
You are depressed because your ancestors fought, danced, and ate meals together, and you eat alone in the dark while staring at a glowing rectangle.

4 weeks ago
alone, ancestor, ancestors, dance, dark, darkness, depressed, depression, eat, eating, eating alone, fight, glowing, glowing rectangle, loneliness, meal, meals, rectangle, staring, technology, together, while
Dating apps aren’t working. I’ll see ya at Home Depot, gentlemen.

1 month ago
activity, app, apps, dating, depot, fun, fun activity, gentlemen, home, Home Depot, humor, relationship, social, working
Movie date at my house, but we use pirated sites and spend all night closing pop-ups.

1 month ago
closing, date, entertainment, home, house, humor, internet, movie, movie date, night, pirated, pirated site, pop-up, site, sites, spend, streaming, technology

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇸 has viewed:

I’m never wrong. Just different levels of right.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

Everyone hates on Gollum but he had the right idea: become a hermit, collect jewels, swim naked in lakes and pools, occasionally hiss at people who try to make you go places.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

If you tell lies about me, I’ll tell the truth about you.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has bookmarked:

I want a restraining order on everyone who doesn’t wear deodorant.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

It’s always annoying to be woken up by some guy mowing his lawn. Just go around me, man.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Me (young, naive): “I hope something good happens.” Me (now): “I hope whatever bad happens is at least funny.”

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

That moment when you realize “yeah, this person is never gonna hear from me again” is so crazy.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

Yes, money alone does not make you happy. It has to be yours too.

Breaking via Telegram:

I had no social life in high school. Even my imaginary best friend had a date for the prom.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

I don’t have red flags, I have fun facts.

Trending via YouTube:

Wiping my hands on my pants before I’m shaking someone’s hand, so they spend the rest of the day wondering what I just touched.

Spotted on YouTube:

The 80s were wild, man. You had bands naming themselves after predatory cats with hearing problems.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

The worst thing you can do while cleaning is sit down for a minute.

Shared recently on TikTok:

I can’t finish cleaning up my room because I get distracted by all of the cool stuff I find.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Welcome to your 50’s; you can have a really good laugh at everyone moaning about their aches and pains in their 30’s.

My advice to kids in kindergarten is to start saving all the money.

You either have a full ketchup bottle in your house or an almost empty one. There’s no in-between.

You are depressed because your ancestors fought, danced, and ate meals together, and you eat alone in the dark while staring at a glowing rectangle.

Movie date at my house, but we use pirated sites and spend all night closing pop-ups.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Using my invisible hula hoop really freaks people out.

Naming my first daughter Piggleigh Wiggleigh.

Sometimes you just need to eat shredded cheese straight out of the bag.

I can’t afford a vehicle with wing doors, so I buy the Tupperware with lids which open that way.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

At this point, if I get picked up by aliens, I’m just gonna go ahead and consider it a rescue mission instead of an abduction.

I miss when you could touch a TV and feel its fur.

I love a touchy-feely man. Like, yes, please keep your hands on me.

Accept the truth that a clean kitchen and finished laundry are just myths. Embrace the chaos and find your inner calm.

I am not living la vida loca. I am loca because of la vida.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Even at my most evil, I’m considerate.

I think the most financially irresponsible thing I’ve done is get my kids to like sushi.

When someone dies people say “he’s going to meet his Maker”. No he’s not. God doesn’t mingle with the staff.

I like to play this fun game while I clean out the fridge called what is this, how long has it been in here and how do I kill it?

I don’t have red flags, I have fun facts.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

They say “Time heals.” No, it doesn’t. I’m still mad.

My bathroom mirror after a long party weekend: “Girl, those vitamins can’t help you now.”

Don’t fall for me — I’ll treat you right, and you’ll get bored and cheat.

Real lovers are currently single, by the way.

The Bible is 100% accurate when thrown at close range.

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏

Activity Log ✨

Welcome to your 50’s; you can have a really good laugh at everyone moaning about their aches and pains in their 30’s.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

My advice to kids in kindergarten is to start saving all the money.

You either have a full ketchup bottle in your house or an almost empty one. There’s no in-between.

Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I wanted to cancel plans.

You are depressed because your ancestors fought, danced, and ate meals together, and you eat alone in the dark while staring at a glowing rectangle.

Dating apps aren’t working. I’ll see ya at Home Depot, gentlemen.

Movie date at my house, but we use pirated sites and spend all night closing pop-ups.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏