Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Looks like your screws are really falling for you! 😄🔩 Keep an eye out for any loose nuts too, just in case they start following suit. 🤪 #DIYdrama"

DIY, every, floor, humor, i, loose, maintenance, odd, screw, think, thoughts, time

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Ever think vampires just lied about hating garlic, now we’re just out here seasoning ourselves for them?

0

2 months ago

cooking, ever, food, garlic, here, humor, irony, joke, just, lie, myth, seasoning, think, vampire
If adulting had a return policy, I’d use it immediately.

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2 months ago

adult, adult life, adulting, humor, ID, joke, life, life joke, policy, responsibility, return, return policy, sarcasm
Babies first steal your glasses and then bite your nose. I don’t know where they get their reputation.

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2 months ago

baby, bite, glasses, humor, i, know, nose, parenting, reputation, where
Blocking people isn’t enough. I need their favorite TV show to get cancelled.

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2 months ago

blocking, cancellation, cancelled, enough, entertainment, favorite, humor, i, media, need, people, revenge, show, social, social media, TV, TV Show
I wonder if the scariest moment ever in history has happened yet.

0

5 months ago

event, ever, fear, future, history, i, moment, scariest, scariest moment, suspense, wonder
I wish I loved exercising as much as I love not exercising.

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2 months ago

exercise, exercising, fitness, humor, i, laziness, love, much, not exercising, wish

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

59 shares on Reddit this month:

If I’m too much for you, then go and find less.

26 shares on TikTok this month:

It’s almost impossible to talk to a girl without flirting with her.

70 shares on Twitch this month:

Forget hot girl summer, it’s rot girl summer (laying in bed, reading books, laying under layers of soft blankets).

24 shares on Twitch this month:

Some of us better hope Santa doesn’t check social media, because if he does, all we’re getting for Christmas is therapy.

11 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The two types of video games are kill everything that moves and Microsoft Excel.

20 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m so glad when summer is over and I finally don’t have to see any feet on the internet anymore.

40 shares on TikTok this month:

I would like even faster food.

53 shares on Twitch this month:

If you’re out shopping this week, be nice to the retail workers. It’s not their fault you waited to shop until Mary’s water broke.

43 shares on YouTube this month:

I hate everyone in front of me at this checkout line, everyone behind me is cool.

17 shares on Facebook this month:

Give us this day our daily internet validation.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇼 has bookmarked:

I am absolutely unstoppable, unless it’s a bit rainy.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Your 20s are for lusting after furniture you can’t afford actually.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has copied:

I’ve tasted being the bigger person, I’ve also tasted matching energy. I recommend no contact.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

Social media is proof that even mental hospitals have WiFi.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

Anytime someone comments on my weight, I try to ignore them and keep my chins up.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

If you were a dinosaur, you’d be a Gorgeousaurus.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

If you’re thinking what I’m thinking, you need professional help.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

If you pretend you’re erasing the evidence of a murder while cleaning the bathroom, you’ll do a better job, and it actually becomes fun!

Someone from 🇵🇪 has viewed:

Live, laugh, leftovers.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

I love when lashes make me look evil.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

I feel like people just come to the airport to cough.

Making waves on WeChat:

Ants can be found on every continent except Antarctica, which is weird considering their name.

Just landed via Facebook:

When Dr. Seuss wrote, “Oh, The Places You’ll Go,” he did not consider how comfortable my couch would be.

Making waves on Instagram:

I wish British people had subtitles so I knew what they are on about.

Shared recently on Twitch:

My optimism doesn’t come out of thin air. A flask is involved.

Making waves on WeChat:

My Saturday was going really well, until I realized it’s Sunday!

Just landed via Snapchat:

Y’all are single because y’all are looking for 90’s love in this sick generation.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

It goes like this: You are born and then you basically do almost everything wrong. Then you die.

Breaking via Discord:

99% of celebrating your birthday as an adult just consists of texting back “thanks so much”.

Seen just now on Discord:

I don’t always clear my calculator, but when I do, I hit both C and CE a bunch of times because I don’t know exactly what they do.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Every time I see an odd screw on the floor somewhere, I think one of my loose ones has finally come out.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Ever think vampires just lied about hating garlic, now we’re just out here seasoning ourselves for them?

If adulting had a return policy, I’d use it immediately.

Babies first steal your glasses and then bite your nose. I don’t know where they get their reputation.

Blocking people isn’t enough. I need their favorite TV show to get cancelled.

I wonder if the scariest moment ever in history has happened yet.

I wish I loved exercising as much as I love not exercising.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨