Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Looks like your screws are really falling for you! 😄🔩 Keep an eye out for any loose nuts too, just in case they start following suit. 🤪 #DIYdrama"

DIY, every, floor, humor, i, loose, maintenance, odd, screw, think, thoughts, time

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53 shares on Twitch this month:

Big city friend is complaining about a 10 minute wait for a subway while I sit here waiting for the rail replacement horse.

68 shares on X this month:

I’m so introverted, I only listen to house music.

99 shares on Instagram this month:

What’s it called when you’re super insecure but, at the same time, you can walk into a room full of people and think you’re better than everyone else?

93 shares on Twitch this month:

When I get filthy rich, I will stay humble by continuing to use grocery bags as bathroom trash bags.

37 shares on Reddit this month:

If lying was a job some people would be billionaires.

92 shares on Pinterest this month:

No offense, fellas, we love compliments, but a compliment from another woman means just a little bit more.

85 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Is it just my dad, or do all fathers watch videos on their phones with the volume full blast, with no concern for anyone else in the house?

80 shares on X this month:

43 shares on LinkedIn this month:

You can’t convince me that 2020 didn’t open a portal to hell that we’re still living in.

44 shares on Instagram this month:

It’s my birthday, but I’m not gonna post about it for attention like some kind of loser.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇺 has bookmarked:

Oligarchy sounds like something you dip your breadstick in at the olive garden.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

“Communism sounds good in theory, but doesn’t work in practice.” Capitalism doesn’t even sound good in theory.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

I love when people say, “In college, I wrote a paper on…” as if that holds any academic merit.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

Luckily, I realized that all this love I want to pour into someone else was actually meant for me.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

The gym gives you energy, but you need energy to get to the gym. Feels like a pyramid scheme, if you ask me.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has viewed:

I’m starting to think that the secret to having a happy life is avoiding people.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

Did it hurt when you forgot your headphones and couldn’t romanticize your walk home?

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Why can’t Chinese restaurants chop the broccoli in their dishes? I feel like I’m trying to fit an entire bonsai tree into my mouth.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

If you’re feeling a little uneasy about the state of global geopolitics, remember to spend as much time on your phone as possible. The more information you ingest as you scroll, the calmer you will become.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

Give yourself time to heal. A couple of decades should do it.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Getting money from the Tooth Fairy is a gateway drug to organ trafficking.

Just shared via Messenger:

People pass a joint around like it’s no big deal, but the minute I ask someone to do that with their Subway sandwich, I’m a weirdo.

Just landed via Slack:

I don’t know what millennial needs to hear this, but throw away the box your phone came in. You don’t need it. You will never need it.

Making waves on Threads:

You try to fart in the toilet in the morning without waking the whole house and thanks to the brilliant acoustics of the toilet bowl, the horn of Gondor sounds.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

If your kids aren’t drinking enough water, tell them it’s bedtime.

Breaking via Threads:

My insurance company said if my tent is stolen while I’m camping, I won’t be covered.

Going viral on Discord:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but you don’t need a special occasion to buy a cake.

Broadcasted on Slack:

You don’t have to remember details when you don’t lie.

Breaking via Discord:

They should invent a rest for the wicked.

Shared recently on Messenger:

Rule #1 for family reunions: Always bring your own car so you can take off whenever you want.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Every time I see an odd screw on the floor somewhere, I think one of my loose ones has finally come out.

That strange moment when you are trying to be serious, but then you accidentally smile.

Does running away from my problems count as cardio?

If you respond to emails and Teams messages quickly, you can get away with basically anything at work.

Shopping at the dollar store makes me feel rich and poor all at the same time.

Might mess around and reply, “That sounds like a you problem,” to every work email today.

Don’t forget to have an orgasm today. Partner is optional. Pleasure is not.

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Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Every time I see an odd screw on the floor somewhere, I think one of my loose ones has finally come out.

Keep the laugh going 😂

That strange moment when you are trying to be serious, but then you accidentally smile.

Does running away from my problems count as cardio?

If you respond to emails and Teams messages quickly, you can get away with basically anything at work.

Shopping at the dollar store makes me feel rich and poor all at the same time.

Might mess around and reply, “That sounds like a you problem,” to every work email today.

Don’t forget to have an orgasm today. Partner is optional. Pleasure is not.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨