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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

Wanna know what the 90’s were like? Put your phone down and go outside.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you start eating chips.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

Some people call me crazy. I prefer the term happy with a twist.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has viewed:

Why waste words or gestures when a raised eyebrow is enough to make a statement?

Someone from 🇫🇷 has downloaded:

Nothing prepared me for how much of my adult life would be spent hiding from people I know at the grocery store.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

Do you scroll through Netflix to find a good show for your dog to watch when you leave the house or are you normal?

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

Cows are very calm, considering the whole floor is food to them.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

Was that meant to be a joke or did you just accidentally spill a bunch of words you were carrying around?

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

I’d be less aggressive in the morning if I could drive to work in a tank.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has viewed:

The secret ingredient to being really funny is childhood trauma.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

237 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,506

Funny Quotes Topics

17,571

Funny Quotes Images

15,506

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,315

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Threads:

My friends wife threatened to leave him over his Star Wars collectibles and I was like “divorce is strong in this one”.

Making waves on Telegram:

Every cat is a little celebrity to me.

Breaking via X:

I woke up extra early today to get in as much ‘worrying about it being Monday tomorrow’ as possible.

Just landed via Telegram:

“Just circling back on this.” – “Take another lap.”

Just shared via Discord:

I need to go to jail for a while to catch up on all my reading.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

At my age, I’m worried about tripping and falling, so I wear a helmet. I’m also worried about looking ridiculous, so I carry a skateboard.

Shared recently on Slack:

Nothing good happens on the credit card after midnight.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Love Island is fun, but when is Job Island on?

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Shade coming from a tree bearing no fruit could never phase me. Carry on.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I’m already sick of tomorrow.

Fries, not lies.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Remember folks: Fries 🍟 are always a better option than lies! Stay crispy, stay truthful! 🤥🚫😋"

comedy, food, food preference, fry, honesty, humor, ly, preference

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Life is just a vicious cycle of needing to go to the grocery store.

0

2 months ago

absurdity, cycle, daily, daily routine, grocery, humor, just, life, routine, shopping, store
Babe, is everything OK? You’ve barely accomplished anything at all in your entire life.

0

5 months ago

accomplishment, anything, babe, communication, conversation, everything, humor, life, motivation, ok, partner, relationship, sarcasm
Due to rising prices, Dollar Tree is changing their name to ‘Tree Fiddy’.

0

2 months ago

changing, dollar, Dollar Tree, due, fiddy, humor, inflation, money, name, price, prices, retail, rising, rising price, shopping, tree, Tree Fiddy
Going from “I can fix her” to “I don’t care if she lives or dies” in the same beer.

0

5 months ago

beer, care, dating, fix, frustration, going, humor, i, mood, mood swing, relationship, same, swing
There are people who leave comments on porn videos.

0

2 months ago

comments, leave, people, porn, videos
“Out of sight, out of mind” doesn’t work for donuts.

0

2 months ago

craving, donut, donuts, food, humor, mind, sight, temptation, work

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

64 shares on Twitch this month:

The best part of vacation with your extended family is talking shit about them on the trip home.

87 shares on Pinterest this month:

Days without shaking my head disapprovingly at myself: 0.

66 shares on Instagram this month:

I believe libraries are our proof that we once valued curiosity.

70 shares on Pinterest this month:

“Fox Mulder” is an aggressively sexy name.

69 shares on Facebook this month:

Applied for an internship to gain experience and got rejected because I didn’t have relevant experience.

89 shares on Discord this month:

Everything is 10 times funnier when you are supposed to be quiet.

87 shares on Messenger this month:

Not single, not dating, but a secret third thing (quantum entanglement).

74 shares on Reddit this month:

At the airport, and a wife asked her husband, “Where are our seats?” and he responds, “In the airplane.”

91 shares on Pinterest this month:

Please don’t buy my book on reverse psychology.

57 shares on Slack this month:

Men used to go to war, now they drinking matcha.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇸 has shared:

I’m the person who requested weather reporters stand in the storms. I have no concept of wind or rain and love seeing needless suffering.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

Called in, “I’m a time traveler. I came in today yesterday.”

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again because I have a terrible memory.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

So, Earth is basically auditions for heaven and hell.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has shared:

Bruce Lee had a faster older brother named Sudden Lee.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

I think Bigfoot had it right, stay in hiding from all the shitty human beings.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has copied:

I wonder if the guy who came up with the term “One Hit Wonder” came up with any other phrases?

Someone from 🇹🇯 has viewed:

High school crushes were crazy because, why the hell was I running all over school just to catch a glimpse of him.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has viewed:

If we were both crows, I’d bring you shiny things.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Drive like no one is watching.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Twitch:

Every time I do something stupid, my dad stares at my mom like he wants a refund.

Spotted on YouTube:

There is nothing worse in life than calling customer service and hearing an Indian accent.

Trending via Slack:

Kinda miss when crushes were butterflies instead of complex emotional calculations about compatibility and red flags.

Going bananas on Facebook:

My playlist so bipolar. We either in love, depressed, or gang members.

Freshly posted on Discord:

When my husband says, “Let me ask my wife,” he’s just using me as an excuse to get out of whatever you’re asking him to do.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

My first rodeo and my last rodeo were the same rodeo.

Just landed via YouTube:

A real smartphone would know when to shut up.

Seen just now on Twitch:

The sweet potato is the kindest vegetable.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Things I hate about group work: The group.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

Shout out to everyone who cooks at 180°C for 20 minutes, no matter what the instructions say.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Fries, not lies.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Life is just a vicious cycle of needing to go to the grocery store.

Babe, is everything OK? You’ve barely accomplished anything at all in your entire life.

Due to rising prices, Dollar Tree is changing their name to ‘Tree Fiddy’.

Going from “I can fix her” to “I don’t care if she lives or dies” in the same beer.

There are people who leave comments on porn videos.

“Out of sight, out of mind” doesn’t work for donuts.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨