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Living solo: where pants are optional and snacks are unlimited! 🏠🙌🍕
240 Funny personal quotes
Apparently, I’m not even going through a lot; I just need money.
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When life gives you lemons, sell them for cash because stress is expensive 🍋💸😅
I would like to thank everyone who destroyed me into the person I am today.
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A big shoutout to all my life coaches, aka the chaos committee! 🙌🤣🔥
Please have a seat and witness my self-destruction firsthand.
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Buckle up for the emotional rollercoaster! 🎢🍿😅
Unfollowing high school people really is a form of self-care.
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Finally, a detox plan I can stick to! 🧼📱😂
Ever since I was a little girl, I knew I never wanted to download the Microsoft Authenticator app on my personal phone to access every professional platform necessary to do my job.
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Who knew "adulting" was just code for "download all the apps your kid self never dreamed of"? 😂📱🔐
Due to personal reasons, I must make it in life.
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Trying to live my best life so I'll have personal reasons to brag at reunions 😎💼✨
Due to personal reasons, I’m evil now.
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Taking applications for minions, must be okay with diabolical plots and occasional evil laughter 😈👹😂
Twitter is just a diary I choose to show to strangers.
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Spilling the tea for strangers has never been this high-tech 🍵🤳📓#DigitalDiary
Accidentally used men’s shower gel today, and I can already feel myself lying for no reason.
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Having a strong urge to grow a beard and start giving unsolicited advice 🤔🧴😂