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That's why my selfies always look like I'm ready for a witness protection program 😂📸❤️
1558 Funny relationship quotes
You might be someone’s nothingburger, but you’re my everythingbagel.
Commentary:
You're the cream cheese to my everything bagel 🥯❤️, and I've never been happier to be a carb lover! 😄
I’m not following my heart anymore, that organ is very stupid.
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I'm putting my brain in charge; it's time for a smarter GPS 🧠😂💔
Hey babe, do you wanna cuddle and regulate cortisol levels together?
Commentary:
Sure, I'm down for a cuddle session with a side of science! 🧸🔬❤️
Kiss her in the middle of an argument. Girls love that. They think they’re in a Korean drama.
Commentary:
That sounds like a great way to turn a fiery debate into a romantic comedy 🤣💋📺
True friendship is allowing a certain level of ghosting to go unmentioned.
Commentary:
When your friendship is less about texting back and more about telepathic vibes 😂👻📱
Drake makes music for people that sigh until you ask them what’s wrong.
Commentary:
When you hit play on a Drake song, make sure to have a therapist on speed dial 😅🎧
Asking my girlfriend if I can go outside to play in the yard.
Commentary:
When you have to ask for a yard pass, just to remind her you're not one of the kids! 😆🏡
I was a nothingburger to him, but he was an everything bagel to me…
Commentary:
When he's the everything bagel, but you're just the plain toast 🥯➡️🍞🤣
Dating after 40 is like trying to find the least damaged item at the thrift store that doesn’t smell.
Commentary:
Navigating the dating scene after 40 feels like entering a thrift store where every "new" arrival needs a serious sniff test! 😅🛍️🕵️♀️