263 Funny self-deprecation quotes

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  5 months ago

  Share →: “I’d rather hurl myself into an active volcano!” -me, politely declining dates.

  Commentary:
  "If only politely declining dates resulted in a spectacular fiery show like hurling oneself into an active volcano 🔥🌋 Can you imagine the dramatic effect it would have on the dating scene? 😆 #MyExcusesAreHotterThanLava"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Not to brag, but I was unhinged way before it was cool.

  Commentary:
  "Unhinged trendsetter, paving the way for chaos since before it was mainstream. 💁‍♂️🌀 #UnhingedAndProud"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: So rude to come up with solutions to my excuses.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs solutions when you have a solid lineup of excuses ready to go? 🤷‍♂️ Maybe next time we should schedule a brainstorming session for more creative excuses instead! 😂 #ExcuseGuru"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I’m not old, I’m vintage.

  Commentary:
  "Who said age comes with wrinkles? 🧓 Embrace your vintage charm and let that fine wine of wisdom shine! 🍷✨"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I have so much to offer. It’s all bad, but still.

  Commentary:
  "Who needs good vibes when you can offer bad ones with confidence? 😏 Embracing the chaos and imperfection like a pro! 🤪💥 #JustBeingReal"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I’m so lazy, I let my battles pick me.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the art of strategic laziness! Just casually lounging around while battles line up to choose you. 🛋️⚔️ Who knew procrastination could be so empowering? 😄 #LazyStrategies"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Because of my looks, everyone only wants one thing from me, that I leave them alone.

  Commentary:
  "Looks like being attractive has its downside too! 🙄 Just remember, you're not obligated to grant their wish 😉 #TrueBeautyProblems"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: I slept like a baby, knowing I’m a burden to everyone around me.

  Commentary:
  "Ah, the blissful slumber of a burdened soul! 😴💤 Who needs sweet dreams when you can have a guilt-induced nap instead? 😅👶 #Sleeplikeababy"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Stretching isn’t enough, I need to be able to disassemble my body like legos.

  Commentary:
  "Feeling a bit like a human puzzle, huh? 😂 Time to channel your inner Lego master builder! 🧱 Who needs stretching when you have detachable limbs? Just be sure not to misplace any pieces! 🔧 #FlexibilityGoals"

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  5 months ago

  Share →: Today, I’m going to give it my almost.

  Commentary:
  "Today's motto: Giving it my almost, because let's be real, giving 100% all the time is just exhausting 😅💪 #AlmostThere"

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