Funny standards quotes

• I’m sorry for setting the impossible standards that the rest of you try to live up to.

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  1 month ago

  apology, arrogance, confidence, exaggeration, humor, impossible, live, rest, sarcasm, self-deprecating, setting, sorry, standards, try

• Disney set unrealistic standards of how often woodland creatures would help me clean and do laundry if I just sang out my window.

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  1 month ago

  clean, creature, creatures, Disney, help, humor, i, just, laundry, me, set, sing, standards, unrealistic, unrealistic standards, window, woodland, woodland creature

• My dating checklist is down to “not the Unabomber”.

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  1 month ago

  checklist, dating, humor, relationship, standards, Unabomber

• Cynics are – beneath it all – only idealists with awkwardly high standards.

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  3 months ago

  attitude, cynic, high, humor, idealist, only, personality, sarcasm, standard, standards

• Sobriety: because my standards got tired of lowering themselves.

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  4 months ago

  drinking, got, humor, lifestyle, self-improvement, sobriety, standard, standards, tired

• I have high standards for dating because I’m a high-quality woman, and you wouldn’t want me any other way.

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  5 months ago

  confidence, dating, high, high-quality, humor, i, me, relationship, standard, standards, want, woman

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