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Quality women really do attract everyone. A bright light always attracts all types of bugs.

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I keep forgetting i’m at the age where people will tell me they’re pregnant and my reaction is supposed to be positive.

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Let’s skip the getting-to-know-you phase. Just block me.

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Google AI is awesome because it kills the planet and doesn’t work.

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My daughter asked me what it’s like to be a parent, so I woke her up at 3 AM to let her know that I couldn’t sleep.

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We work all week to work some more around the house all weekend long. Isn’t life grand?

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Sperm me would be swimming in the other direction.

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At the first signs of a sore throat, you should be given the option of just skipping four days into the future.

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Whoever told you there’s no such thing as a stupid question lied.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

Just spoke to my wife while the internet was down. She seems nice. She’s a nurse apparently.