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Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Parenting sometimes feels like you’re an elevator. Lots of ups and downs and the kids love to push your buttons.
  • Petition to bring back payphones in public places. I don’t want to give my kid a phone, I want to give him a quarter.
  • Maybe there’s an alternate universe where onions cry when they chop up humans, you don’t know.
  • “Do what you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.” Yeah, because I won’t be leaving my bed.
  • I have 206 bones, 650 muscles and 50 billion cells in my body. It takes time to wake up all of them up in the morning.
  • Hey man, be careful on the trampoline, one of my buddies never came back down.